Through The Glasses I've Been Given

Love is patient, love is kind

2009-09-07T19:19:00.003-04:00

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Do unto others as you would have them do to you. Luke 6:31

There are several Bible verses that, as a Catholic, I use as inspiration for how I live; above are two of them. I also utilize these verses when I look at the behavior/actions of others and in the instruction of my children and others that are entrusted to me. For several days I have wanted to write this blog posting but instead of writing out of anger I took the time to pray and reflect. Now I am ready to write a posting that will hopefully be constructive and upbuilding.

This past weekend was our Church festival - Mahrajan -- and on two previous occasions I posted about how much I was looking forward to Nathaniel's participation in it. I presented this experience as a positive experience in his interaction with the Church and up until Friday night I was looking forward to posting a great follow-up to my earlier postings; unfortunately, the events that began to unfold Friday changed the dynamics of this posting.

Then they brought young children to Him, that He might touch them; but the disciples rebuked those who brought them. But when Jesus saw it, He was greatly displeased and said to them, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of God. "Assuredly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will by no means enter it."And He took them up in His arms, put His hands on them, and blessed them. Mark 10:13-16

Nathaniel is 14 years old and in today's culture he is far from considered a little child but one of the things I find most endearing about Nathaniel, and many other children with developmental disabilities, that I have had the pleasure of knowing or working with, is their child-like innocence that they seem to never loose. Nathaniel approaches everything as a "little child," I feel that is why he glows and is so much at ease at Disney World -- it is the one place he knows where everyone comes as a child and he is secure in being a child when he is there.

What makes up the qualities of little children that I believe Jesus was calling us all too. They are trusting. They are not perfect. Love comes naturally for them. Little children are not afraid to show affection. Their inhibitions are limited and they lean on people they trust (parents and other caregivers) for support, direction and encouragement. God desires us to come to him as little children and it is sad that are society considers the above mentioned characteristics as being deficits in ones personalities not positive attributes.

Friday night Nathaniel and Rebecca went to church for a dress rehearsal. They rehearsed from 7pm till about 9:45pm ( a huge sacrifice for Nathaniel because he is not a "night owl"). I stayed, this time, to make sure I got all the necessary information and because I did not know how long it would take. As I stood and watched the rehearsal, I must admit, I was filled with excitement for Nathaniel. Wow! Nathaniel is doing it was my thought as I watched him from 7pm until about 8:30pm.

Could he do it perfectly? No - far from it. Was he in sync? No, he was not. Could you tell he was different? Of course you could. But, does that matter? If the Church is the holder of Truth and God is both Truth and Love then as the passage above from 1st Corinthians teaches us -- IT SHOULD NOT MATTER!!!

To advisers of the MYO (Maronite Youth Organization) it did matter. Because, after about 5 weeks of practices, sometimes 3 times in a week, and sessions practicing with his sister at home Nathaniel was now not going to dance. About 24 hours from their first performance he was being told he was NOT going to dance. People's pride, self-seeking behavior and need to boast got in the way of the feelings of a "little child" that was to be devastated.

The decision had been made a week earlier that Nathaniel was going to hold a flag for the 2nd song but he was going to dance the first (a decision I agreed with because two was too much). He was always dancing the first song. And I saw him do it.

What did I see when I watched? I saw a child that worked hard. I saw a child that despite all his limitations put his all into doing the best he could. And anyone that knew the Nathaniel (a large number of the attendees since most come from our Church) would, I hope seen the same. Yes, he was slower and out of sync but he was doing HIS best. He was doing more than I ever thought he could do and then for the second song he went and held his flag with pride.

I can only guess what happened. They saw Nathaniel "stick out." They saw THEIR dance not looking as good as it could. They did not want to present a product that was not professional. What they did not see was a group of 11 children that gave of their time and talents to do something special for THEIR church. They did not see a boy with special needs, who 5 weeks ago could not hop -- and now could. They did not see this same boy excited and eager to do something for his church and crushed and angry when told he could not dance (they did not see that inpart because I took him aside and let him vent his anger to me).

Saturday and Sunday was not much better. We went into the weekend knowing that he would be only holding the flag; something he did for all 4 performances with a smile on his face even though he was angry and hurt. He was also suppose to work with the other MYO members Saturday and Sunday in the games area.

On Saturday I assisted with finding him a job. He worked with MiMi, one of the adults, and she was wonderful with Nathaniel. (Thank You!! ) He assisted in selling the games tickets. This seemed to go well until MiMi was replaced with one of the MYO advisers. Once he came Nathaniel was no longer engaged and his job of passing out the tickets was usurped. Instead of being an active participant he was delegated to just "sitting." Also, when all of the MYO members where given meal coupons Nathaniel was not. When the adviser passed out "special" bracelets for the kids Nathaniel was not given one. He worked hard and was VERY happy to be there but he was treated as a "second class member" of a group he so desperately wants to be part of. Even interactions with peers where difficult at best, but I can't blame them if the advisers are modeling exclusionary behaviors.

Sunday, Rebecca, his sister advocated for him. Thank you Rebecca! She made sure he got his meal ticket and she was gracious in working with him on the games. He worked several games on Sunday and enjoyed his time doing it. He performed (held the flag) as was planned and the weekend ended.

After the 6pm performance on Sunday I witnessed something very disappointing. After the children completed their dance demonstration they remained on the dance floor to begin the crowd dancing a folk line dance. I witnessed what I am afraid will continue if the adults excluding Nathaniel continues. Both times that Nathaniel attempted to take the hand of a peer to join in the line the child pulled their hand away and refused to take Nathaniel's. Finally an adult from the crowd took his hand and for the next 35 minutes he danced in the line with a smile on his face.

We need to be inclusive in our churches and their organizations. We need to teach our children to be inclusive and help them to understand the limitations that certain members bring with them. If we do not understand ourselves then please ask for help. I am going to ask, again, to be allowed to make a presentation (or have someone come in) about Autism and what it means. Hopefully if it is done in a fun and multimedia fashion people will be better informed so that they can truly welcome Nathaniel. Below are some things you can do to help understand yourself.

Active IDEAS to help teenagers understand Autism better

1. Autism's main component is having an Auditory Processing Disorder. Try playing several cd's at one time and read a poem at the same time. Read at the same level of the music. Have the group record your words only.

2. Another activity, to warm up with, is to have the students place a 3X5 card on their forehead, with their opposite writing hand, hold the pen or pencil, then instruct them to write their name with the card on their forehead and without looking at themselves.

3. Lastly, people with autism often have a greater sense of smell, hearing, or are tactile intolerant (hate the feel of some fabrics and objects). Give students bags with something very smelly in them, then instruct them to keep it closed until you have completed the rules. The rules, remain in seat, be quiet, and write down sentences that you are giving them orally (Say 10 silly sentences). They are not to talk or react. Then they are to open the bags and pay attention to you. It gives a good idea of how challenging it can be for a person with autism that has a great sense of smell to put up with someones stinky feet smell.

4. PULL IT ALL TOGETHER Put a heavy piece of fabric over the top of your head, then turned the lights on and off, at the same time rub your arm with a piece of sand paper, now turn the sound system up to high and finally spray the room with floral air freshener. While all this is going on one person gives a talk. The point of this exercise is to demonstrate the sensory issues that many hyper-sensitive children with autism face everyday. Imagine being bombarded by your nervous system and expected to learn how to talk, interact, engage, and act like there is nothing wrong with you.

NOTE: Once I find a missing cable I will post more photos and video from the weekend.

Dance Times

2009-09-04T16:24:00.000-04:00

The church fesival is this weekend.

Saturday 5pm - 11pm

Sunday 1pm -- 11pm

Nathaniel abd the Dance Troupe will be performing as follows:

Saturday -- 9:30pm Sunday -- 5:30pm and 9:30pm

When not performing you can probably see him working in the Children's Area

Saturday 5-9:30pm Sunday 1-9:00pm

If you can make it please come by.

Saint Anthony's

ANNUAL MAHRAJAN
September 5-6, 2009
Saint Anthony Maronite Church
1145 Amesbury Street
Lawrence, MA 01841
978-685-7233
http://www.stanthonylawrence.org/

Regarding Cardinal Sean

2009-09-03T19:58:00.001-04:00

Some of you may have read a blog posting that I had on for a few hours on Thursday. I decided to remove it after a good friend said something that made me think a bit. I am taking what he said to prayer at this time.

I want to thank God for good friends that will point out when they think we have errored.

Let us all pray for Sen. Kennedy and pray that by the grace of God he has entered the Heavenly Kingdom.

I would also like to apologize to Cardinal Sean for not respecting him as Shepard.

Should I Sterilize my Autistic Son?

2009-09-02T08:46:00.002-04:00

"Should I sterilize my Autistic son when he is about 18? My husband and I will probably be his legal guardians and we want to save a girl that he might have sex with (and her family) from the possibility of a child or worse the abortion of a child."

This question was recently asked of me by good Catholics struggling with the overwhelming prospect of raising their child.

This couple is not evil. They are trying to do what is best; they are struggling with doing what is right and are seeking out the truth. It is common today to put children with Developmental Disabilities on birth control, to sterilize or to give medication early on in their life to prevent them from fully maturing sexually. The question they are asking is, Is this right?

Sterilization would be a "simple" solution to a complex problem. It would also buy into Eugenics -- the study of, or belief in, the possibility of improving the qualities of the human species or a human population by such means as discouraging reproduction by persons having genetic defects or presumed to have inheritable undesirable traits (negative eugenics) or encouraging reproduction by persons presumed to have inheritable desirable traits (positive eugenics).--, which was why Margey Sanger founded Planned Parenthood and was at the core of many of Adolf Hitler's theories. Sanger advocated the use of birth control to bring about Eugenics here in the USA and eventually abroad. Hitler advocated sterilization as a means to his Arlan race.

In the 1930's when Eugenics was rampant in the United States as a philosophy of thought a movie came out that looked at the evil of forced sterilization. The movie Tomorrow's Children came out in 19 34 and was about a young woman who wishes to marry her boyfriend and raise a family, but because her own family has been deemed “defective” by the state health authorities–her parents are lazy alcoholics who continue to have children, and several of her brothers and sisters have mental problems–she is ordered by a court to undergo sterilization so that her family’s “defective genes” won’t be passed on to any more children. Her boyfriend and a kindly priest desperately search for a way to stop the forced sterilization before it’s too late. The movie is available on YouTube through the links posted here. Tomorrow's Children Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

When we force sterilize a segment of our population we create a society where those "unsuited" to preo-create are not allowed to procreate. It is done with a goal to creates a society avoid of illness, disease, disability, disfigurement, etc... ; however, sterilization though masking itself as a good is really an abomination against God.

The Catechism of the Catholic Church says:

"except when performed for strictly therapeutic medical reasons, directly intended amputations, mutilations, and sterilizations performed on innocent persons are against the moral law."

"Purifying" society or making my life or the life of someone else easier is not "strictly theraputic." Yes, it could be more difficult if this adult with Autism fathered a child but committing a sin to prevent this is not a justifiable answer. We cannot sin in order to prevent future sin. This applies even if we are trying to protect someone else from sinning. You don't know that the baby would be killed by abortion. If a baby were to occur somehow, at some point, it would have the same rights to life as any other baby. Who knows, it might be the way God brings another great saint into the world? If they would not be capable of raising them, there is always the possibility of the girl raising them or adoption.

Then what can we do?

The best we can do is to educate our special needs child to the best of our ability. We need to be able to discuss with him/her sexuality to the ability they can comprehend. We need to ensure that they know their body is a sacred vessel not to be touched or compromised. We need to teach over and over that sexual intimacy is only for marriage. If we are their guardians through adulthood we need to try to prevent situations where sexual activity may arise. Also, if they father a child or become pregnant we need to be the VOICE for LIFE even offering to raise the child.

Good intended people are sterilizing children/adults with disabilities. They are passing out condoms and birth control and doing all they can to prevent procreation. They do not see the sanctity of sexual intimacy. They only see the potential "harms" if these children procreate. They are not bad people, just misinformed. Let us pray that they see why forced sterilization, birth control, etc... are morally wrong. Let us pray that they understand we cannot sin to prevent future sin. Let us all work towards better education without sin.

Isolation is the Key to Succesful Integration -- What???

2009-09-01T15:22:00.001-04:00

Nathaniel is back from his first day. And I want to scream.

He was happy and had a good day, by his standards. Let me talk about the positives. He came home and was able to name the children in his PDD Classroom (good because they have been the same for 4 years 1/2 of them for 7 years).

"I didn't go nowhere!!! I stayed in the class. You no like Sam and Bob. They don't go nowhere. No gym. No art. No lunch room. No Home room. Nowhere, ok!!!!" Nathaniel's response today when I asked him about going to his inclusion time (names changed of peers for their privacy).

Now the negatives:

1) We Knew he was going to have a new teacher in the PDD Room (the 4th year in a row with a new teacher). I sat on the interview committee and was happy with the selection. When we asked him who his new teacher was he said it was the teacher from the classroom next door last year. This was not the one that I thought was being hired -- in fact she did not interview. Of course, I can not verify because he came home with nothing that says the name of the new teacher. A nice letter of introduction would have been appropriate.

2)The bus picked Nathaniel up on the wrong side of teh street. Special Needs children are not suppose to cross the street. Not a big deal but a simple policy that should be followed.

3) As Is always the case on the first day Nathaniel did not begin any of his inclusionary classes; not even Homeroom or lunch. They kept him in the "fully Separate" classroom all day.

4) He brought home no list that had the names of teh students in his class or the paras in his class. It would be nice especially to know who his 1:1 is. He says there is no Ms. Burns who he has had the past 3 years.

5) Nathaniel had NO special today (art, gym, etc...). The other students (regular ed) all would have. He should have had it as inclusionary time.

Nathaniel is made to feel more like an outsider when these issues occur. That first day is critical to knowing one's classmates. With Nathaniel too often they will strat inclusion after about 2 weeks of school has occurred and that creates a strong dynamic of him being an outsider, someone who is being thrust into their environment.

Year after year the same issues and no matter what I do to try to make for a smoother start they repeat the same over and over. I am sick of it!!!!

A new Fight - aka School Year -- Begins

2009-09-01T10:45:00.002-04:00

First day of the new school year, Nathaniel would be starting as a Freshman in High School this year but we kept him back in 1st grade. That was our first attempt at trying to get over the reading hump. We gave a second go around at 1st grade; unfortunately, that did not work and still he can not read.

So, he is going into 8th grade and as with any school year we pray for the best. We pray that the obstacles and trials will be less than the year before and we continue to pray that somehow this year will be the year when Nathaniel begins to read. It is, ultimately, his greatest obstacle.

Having a child with special needs can be a challenge on so many fronts. When as child has a developmental disability those challenges are on every front. In your family you are constantly working towards helping others to understand your child (and lets admit you are often trying to understand your child yourself). When in public you are always aware of the looks and see the chatter; if you let yourself, you become paranoid and stop venturing out in public. In church you are faced with having a child that has great difficulty conforming to the expected behavior. But the GREATEST challenge I feel has been trying to deal with the school system.

We have only dealt with one but as I begin another year we are still struggling. Nathaniel is beginning the school year with parts of the current IEP (Individualized Education Plan) rejected. I have been trying for several weeks to connect with the ETC (Educational Team Chairperson) so that we can "discuss" the areas I rejected to hopefully come to an agreement so that the IEP can be signed and fully implemented. By starting the IEP with rejected parts we are working off last years IEP now and his education is once again stalled. No return phone calls, no responses to email requests -- nothing!!!

If we do not reach an agreement we then can go to mediation or a hearing. This requires us to pay for advocates and/or lawyers and to pay for additional testing (possibly). We also could have to pay for experts to come testify if it goes to hearing. Nathaniel is 14 and we have already spent over $14,000 to fight the district for what is just and right. I would rather not waste their time, my time and unnecessary dollars but it is a game.

The school department has limited resources and if they could I feel they would offer every child what they need for a free and appropriate education, but they can not. So what do they do? They offer the minimum to all and up the offerings depending on how vocal you are. Then they force you to rely on your resources (money) to fight them. The belief is that everybody has a financial breaking point and at some point in the process you will accept less than you should get because you just cannot financially afford to fight anymore. For those that can continue the fight the amount of time it takes to push it through the hearings and judicial process is so long that months and even years of educational opportunities are lost on the child while the issues are fought out. Who wins??

Are the school districts malicious? No, I don't think so, but they are working with unfunded mandates. What are they to do?

They need to do the best they can for all the children under their care and spread around a pot of money way to small and I need to expect the best for Nathaniel and do whatever I can to assure that he gets it. Too often people that should be working hand-in-hand for the best of the child are forced into an adversarial relationship. I can only hope that the issues, this year, get quickly resolved but at the same time I am already worried about next year and what it is going to take to make high school a positive opportunity for learning.

He Can Dance!!!!!!!------- Update

2009-08-31T16:03:00.001-04:00

Note: Today is very humbling. In 24 hours my number of hits has doubled over all the hits up to that time. I hope I do not disappoint. God is answering my prayer. I need to believe that. I want to be a voice that facilitates people to thin k and discuss and this can only occur if people read. So thank you and please continue to read and spread the news.

As I wrote previously Nathaniel has been preparing for the church festival (Maharajahn) this weekend (Labor Day). This is the largest fundraiser for our church and many take an active roll. It is two days of Lebanese food, drink, and entertainment. Their is a Children's area complete with games, bouncy rides, and this year a dunk tank (Nathaniel thinks it is great that Msgr. has agreed to be in the dunk tank -- he has been practicing his throwing.)

Nathaniel is part of the MYO (Maronite Youth Organization) and they are responsible for the children's area and the Lebanese Folk Dance demonstration. He, and his sister Rebecca, have been working hard to prepare for the dancing especially.

Nathaniel is not the most active person and as you can imagine preparing for this has been difficult but rewarding. He knows both dances they will perform he just has difficulty actually performing some of the steps. Rebecca has been upset because he tends to sit down the last 15-30 minutes of practices that last from 90-120 minutes. The dancing involves a lot of hopping (something he could never even do before he prepared for this) and it takes its toll on him physically. I am amazed he last an hour. He may not look correct all the time but he smiles and enjoys the fact that he is part of something. He is with his peers and mommy and daddy are not there. He is an individual, a real teenager. That is what is important to me.

Tonight is his 3rd straight night of practices. I hope he makes it. Last night they also had an MYO meeting before the practice to work on posters for the children's area. Nathaniel and 3 others made posters for the Face Painting. He was so proud of his accomplishments telling me how he drew faces on the posters and got to sign his name on the bottom of the poster. It is good to see him excited about something and fitting in. And, I am so happy that the advisors and other MYO members have welcomed him and are giving him the chance to be Nathaniel and grow with them.

I pray that this experience will continue to be a positive one for Nathaniel. I pray that his differences in the dancing will not cause people to laugh at or "talk about him," but rather that they can see the joy that he has being up there on the stage with his peers doing good for the church he so desperately wants to be part of.

Saint Anthony's
ANNUAL MAHRAJAN
September 5-6, 2009
Saint Anthony Maronite Church
1145 Amesbury Street
Lawrence, MA 01841
978-685-7233
http://www.stanthonylawrence.org/

The PURPOSE of Marriage

2009-08-30T16:23:00.003-04:00

We cannot talk about the sanctity of life without understanding the purpose of marriage, for it is in marriage that we are suppose to bring forth life. That does not mean that life created outside of marriage is not to be viewed as sacred. God works through what we give Him and sometimes we make mistakes.

I have thought long and hard about how do I simply state the Purpose of a Christian Marriage. I could walk you through an extensive exogesis on the subject. I could quote the fathers of the church down through the centuries. I could draw on examples from real marriages and film.

I wanted to be short and concise, not drawn out. My desire was to present the topic in a clear and concise manner that was also memorable. So I took it to prayer and as I prayed the answer came to me.

PURPOSE is the best way to sum up and remember the purpose of a Christian marriage.

PURPOSE

Procreation - God calls all married couples to be OPEN to the possibility of children. Go forth and multiply.
Union - It is a loving partnership of living together. We are to die to self and united with our spouse.
Rearing children - Having children is the easy part. We need to raise them in the tenets of God.
Pattern for society - We are to be an example of how society is to interact with each other.
One flesh - It is only in marriage that we are to UNITE in sexual intimacy.
Sacred - Marriage is sacramental and blessed by God. A marriage of 3. Husband-Wife-God
Endless - Marriage is for our entire life. It is a lifelong relationship.

God Bless all of you!!!

Prayer to Understand the Purpose of Marriage

by Bernard Hassan

Dear Lord!

Help us all to understand the true PURPOSE of marriage.

Married or single we relish the sacredness of a man and women united for life.

We see your hand in their evergiving relationships that we have witnessed,

And we ask you to bless all the marriages of people we know and do not know.

Marriage can be a struggle

It is lived in a complex world that often has lost sight of its true PURPOSE.

Please help us to never loose sight of why we have marriage.

And allow us to lean on You and the graces You bestowed on our wedding day.

Heavenly Father we pray for your compasion on our marriages

Lord and Savior Jesus Christ we pray for your strength in our marriage.

Holy Spirit we pray for your wisdom as we raise the children entrusted to us.

We pray all this through the intercession of the most perfect bride, Mary and her faithful husband, Joseph.

--Amen

"God, I am not a dummy."

2009-08-28T10:29:00.001-04:00

I asked Nathaniel today to tell me what he would want to tell God about how other people treat him?

His answer brought me to tears:

"God I am not a dummy. God I am nice. I love you God. The kids are mean. They do not want to play with me. God I am smart. I am good. They laugh at me. People yell at me. I want a friend. God you are my friend. I talk to you. At night I talk to you. I am not a dummy."

Note: For those of you new to my blog, Nathaniel is my 14 year old son. He has Autism and Epilepsey and he is the inspiration for this blog.

A New Opportunity for Christian Chairity

2009-08-27T13:56:00.002-04:00

Before I was disabled due to psoriatic arthritis, and the comorbidities that developed I was an ABA therapist. I worked at Nashoba Learning Group (NLG) in Bedford, MA. (www.Nashobalearninggroup.org) NLG is a small school that specializes in teaching children with severe forms of Autism. They serve a population of students from age 3-22 and have a curriculum that touches on the whole life of the child. I see their ultimate goal is to bring each child as far as they can so that they can be the best member of society possible. To accomplish this they are involved in vocational training at age 14 (for many students even earlier as pre-vocational training to develop core skills they will need).

Why am I writing this? What does this have to do with Christian charity? I see an incredible opportunity for the church. The students need two things: 1) a place to practice and develop the skills in public 2) somebody who will employ them once they are competent and independent in the skills they have acquired (or at least in need of no more than a shadow). I feel that the church is in a perfect position to do both. I believe that it fits with the church's mission for both Christian charity and evangelization and it will help to foster better relations with a community that feels shunned. Let me explain how.

Many churches would love to reach out to the community more than they currently do. They have a heart for social causes and social justice issues. Many a good idea dies a good idea. Normally because of one of two reasons; not enough monetary resources or not enough human resources. I am going to offer to you a way to reach out to community; to a population that so often the community at large shuns and misunderstands. And the plus is that the monetary and human resources required will be little to none. If you are a pastor, parish administrator, buildings and grounds manager, parish council member, youth minister, director of religious education, or just a parishioner that sees how this can work for your parish I am writing to you.

At the school I was at the students in the vocational program were learning many skills. They were learning, office work; how to collate, file in alphabetical and numerical order, how to do mailings, stapling and hole punching, using a paper cutter, and many other tasks. They were learning retail tasks; how to take inventory, stocking shelves, pricing items, running a register, folding merchandise to name a few. Housekeeping and custodial skills were learned by many; laundry skills, cleaning a bathroom, cleaning a bedroom, cleaning a common area and so much more. And, they were learning kitchen and commissary skills; setting a table, cleaning a table, cleaning a dining room, cooking, cleaning dishes, and more. The skills are taught in a controlled environment using something called task analysis. Step-by-step the children learn how to complete each task with precision and accuracy. As they get older, they need places in the community where they can generalize the skills and eventually become productive members of society where they are paid for their work. The church could be the perfect fit.

How do we do this? How do we as church welcome the students? We reach out; we invite; we make it happen. There are many similar schools across the United States and the world, where these vocational programs are happening; find them and make a phone call. Ask to speak to the vocational director or whoever is in charge of the vocation training. Discuss with them how you can help them. You can provide them with a warm, inviting and nonjudgmental place where their children can practice their skills and the benefit is mutual. They can help with the church mailing; they can photocopy for religious education; they can clean the buildings and grounds. They can file the baptismal certificates and wedding certificates. They can data entry the church census, weekly collection, or so many other things. They can help the youth minister get ready for an upcoming retreat by putting together the packets for each retreatant. I believe, the possibilities are endless. We just need to get creative and recognize that they can help us as much as we can help them.

My son Nathaniel is 14. We do not know yet what he will do in society. It is still a great mystery, but right now we do know that most of what he sees as church is not inviting to him. He has been made to feel like an outsider, like he does not belong. He is not in a vocational program at this time, but if he was I can't but believe that the program I am proposing would be well received. We will get many non-Catholics, and non-Christians if we connect with these secular schools, but that's okay. This is an opportunity for us to bear witness to the love of Christ. This is a form of quiet evangilization both to the students and their parents, the teachers or therapist, and the administrators. It is our chance to show the developmentally disabled community that we welcome them. Let us try to make a difference.

If anybody is already doing this in their church community or if because of reading this you develop a program similar to the one I'm describing then please comment on it. Share with us the pros and cons. I am speaking hypothetically. I would love to see it in action.

Making the written word accessible

2009-08-26T15:16:00.001-04:00

I just purchased Dragon NaturallySpeaking. My hope in purchasing this is twofold. Because of my psoriatic arthritis using a keyboard can be very painful. Also, Nathaniel is not able to read or type well. I hope that this will give him more access to the written word. The key will be is it able to recognize his spoken word. The new version is suppose to have features built into it to better recognize the speech of disabled individuals. Let's pray this is true.

I have dictated this entire post using Dragon NaturallySpeaking. As of right now I am impressed. One thing is for sure it's spell's better than me. I will update you on how well it performs in the future. I will also be sure to write once we have trained it to Nathaniel's voice.

Dragon naturally speaking hopefully it will be an answer to our prayers. Hopefully it will make the written word accessible to Nathaniel.

Senator Kennedy Advocate for the Disabled.................but,

2009-08-26T08:56:00.002-04:00

In 1962 the youngest brother of the Kennedy Clan was elected to serve in the United States Senate as the Junior Senator from Massachusetts. His legacy has left an imprint on this nation as few have ever been able to achieve. Early on the morning of August 25, 2009 Senator Edward "Teddy" Kennedy passed away after a 15 month battle with brain cancer. He was 77 years old. In 1980 he unsuccessfully attempted to achieve the US presidency as his brother John had done (and tragically died while serving) and his brother Robert who tragically died while he was campaigning; but Teddy's legacy was formed on the Senate floor where he earned (and wore with pride) the label of "Liberal Lion" of the Senate and died the highly esteemed Senior Senator from Massachusetts.

I have never agreed with all that Senator Kennedy stood for but their are qualities about him that I have admired over the years. He stood for something! So many in politics do not take a stand. They stand for whomever is writing the largest paycheck; whomever gives the strongest endorsement. Kennedy always seemed to take a stand but was also, always willing to listen to opponents and attempt a compromise as long as his core principals did not have to compromise. (This was very evident in his working with President George W. Bush on the No Child Left Behind Act.)

Ted Kennedy also reached out to those in need even if you did not support him. This, I feel, was part of the Kennedy family feeling that civil service was at the core of what they did. They saw themselves as servants to the people and Ted truly lived a life of service especially after his failed presidential bid in 1980.

As a resident of Massachusetts (and the United States) Kennedy's office was always available to me if I needed help or assistance and it did not matter that I was a registered republican. Over the years I have heard of many people with drastic ideological differences from Senator Kennedy that he went out of his way to help. He (and his office) also always replied unlike so mny others that I have communicated with over the years.

My struggle in writing this blog entry is spoken so clearly in Pope Benedict XVI's latest encyclical, Caritas jn Veritate (Charity In Truth). In this encyclical Pope Benedict emphasized that all charity needs to be rooted in and acknowledge truth. If we deny truth then no matter what we do in a charitable manner is valueless. We cannot bring about good at the expense of truth. Charity is only genuine when it is based upon the truth concerning the individual as a creature of God, redeemed by Jesus Christ. When the truth of the human person, along with his origin and his destiny, is forgotten, untold ills can result. The last century has proven this to be all too true. And Senator Kennedy was at the center of the "charity without truth" movement in this country and throughout the industrialized world.

As I addressed in my entry about Cain and Abel the Church's core truth of man's existence is that life is the one and only right guaranteed to all of humanity. And this life is from conception to a natural death. Senator Kennedy was a strong advocate for the disabled and their rights. He was an advocate for the medically ill and fragile and worked for access for all and coverage that was thorough and accessible. But, he did not value the life of the unborn for he worked against the unborn through legislation and public statements upholding legal and legislative decisions that killed the most innocent. As I read the encyclical of Pope Benedict the question echoes in my head; Was the legislative life of Ted Kennedy for not because he ignored the fundamental truth yet did so much good for many? God will need to be the judge.

As a parent of a disabled child and an uncle of two I am in a great debt to Ted Kennedy. The world would be a very different place for my child today had Senator Kennedy (and the Kennedy family) not taken up the mantle for the disabled. This was probably rooted in their strong family values and the reality that one of their own had mental retardation; but still he took the mantle, as his own, and did much so that all could have the access and guarantees that without this legislation he fought hard to pass only money could buy.

I do not agree with much that Senator Ted Kennedy did. I personally feel that he was not a good Catholic (a sin to say such a thing here in Massachusetts), but thankfully I am not the ultimate judge. I also feel that his personal life lived on the front pages for so many years spoke of a person with questionable morals at best.

However, Senator Ted Kennedy has left a lasting mark on my family and for that I am grateful. Without the legislation that he championed on behalf of Disabled Americans my son, Nathaniel, would have had a very different life up to this point and a much more difficult life ahead of him. May God have mercy on Senator Kennedy's soul. All I can do now is pray for him. Rest in Peace Senator Kennedy.

Below I highlight the legislation that Senator Kennedy sponsored, co-sponsored, endorsed or in some way had a strong hand in passing to assist the disabled in the United States of America. The list begins in 1973. Prior to this time he worked extensively on Civil Rights legislation and other areas.

1973 -- Kennedy began his push for the education of the disabled. He also introduces a bill that puts safe guards on medical testing.

1975 -- Kennedy co-sponsors Education for all Handicapped Children Act. This would become the Individuals with Disabilities Act

1978 -- Works to expand the Civil Rights Commission Act giving the commission the power to protect people with disabilities from discrimination.

1980 -- Kennedy introduces the Civil Rights for Institutionalized Persons Act

1984 -- Kennedy introduces special legislation that required all polling stations be accessible to the disabled.

1986 -- Introduced the Employment Opportunities for Disabled Americans Act making them members of Social Security Act.

Introduced the Handicapped Children's Protection Act -- this act overturned a Supreme Court decision and enabled courts to award attorney fees to parents of children with disability litigation.

Sponsors Education of the Handicapped Act Amendments that awarded grants for the early childhood education of children with disabilities.

1988 -- Introduced Fair Housing Act Amendments that extended the laws to to prohibit discrimination towards people with disabilities in the sale or rental of housing.

Senator Kennedy introduced legislation to provide funding to all 50 states to raise awareness about the use of assistive technology to improve the life's of people with disabilities.

1990 -- Was a key force in enacting the Americans with Disabilities Act

1994 -- Senator Kennedy played a key role in passing the Family and Medical Leave Act -- This act is invaluable to many of us with disabled children or adults in our lives. It gives us the ability to maintain job security and care for the needs of our loved ones.

1996 -- Sponsored the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act

2004 -- Works hard for the re authorization of the Individuals with Disabilities Act

2006 -- Introduces the Family Opportunity Act -- This act allowed states to expand Medicaid for children with Special Needs.

2008 -- Helped to enact the Mental Health Parity Act which requires medical insurance companies to offer parity between the benefits they offer for physical and mental illness.

Cain and Abel and our Culture of Death

2009-08-25T20:06:00.000-04:00

Genesis 4:2-16 Now Abel was a keeper of sheep, and Cain a tiller of the ground.
³In the course of time Cain brought to the Lord an offering of the fruit of the ground, and Abel for his part brought of the firstlings of his flock, their fat portions. And the Lord had regard for Abel and his offering, but for Cain and his offering he had no regard. So Cain was very angry, and his countenance fell. ⁴⁵
⁶The Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry, and why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin is lurking at the door; its desire is for you, but you must master it.” ⁷
⁸Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let us go out to the field.” And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel, and killed him.
⁹Then the Lord said to Cain, “Where is your brother Abel?” He said, “I do not know; am I my brother’s keeper?” And the Lord said, “What have you done? Listen; your brother’s blood is crying out to me from the ground! And now you are cursed from the ground, which has opened its mouth to receive your brother’s blood from your hand. When you till the ground, it will no longer yield to you its strength; you will be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth.” ¹⁰¹¹¹²
¹³Cain said to the Lord, “My punishment is greater than I can bear! Today you have driven me away from the soil, and I shall be hidden from your face; I shall be a fugitive and a wanderer on the earth, and anyone who meets me may kill me.” Then the Lord said to him, “Not so! Whoever kills Cain will suffer a sevenfold vengeance.” And the Lord put a mark on Cain, so that no one who came upon him would kill him.

Currently we live in a culture of death. The most innocent lifes are no longer valued. Any life that would require a greater level of acceptance, love and care is considered usless, or to be such a burden that it is rejected. Where did this culture of death begin? and What are we as Christians called to?

The story of Cain and Abel above is the beginning point for the culture of death that is currently rampant in our society and fearfully ever growing. God senses the anger in Cain and he tells him that sin desires to take control. For anger that is uncontrolled leads one to sin. God tells Cain that it is his responsibility to master the sin and not let it control him.

How often do we master the sin of anger? Do we allow it to control us? Do we move towards vengance, violence and other actions against our brother when we are angry? How about the sin of lust, and jealousy? How about when we feel over burden and don't trust that God will only give us what we can handle? Do we turn towards God for strength or do we allow the sin to control us? In this story Cain committs the ultimate act of violence, murder. Cain takes the life of his brother because he was unable to control the sin of anger that swelled up inside him kike a cancer. Sin is very much like a cancer. It begins as a small act or reaction and grows and grows and grows until we are no longer in control. The earlier we attempt to control it the better our chances, just like cancer.

God then questions Cain asking him "Where is your brother." Cain's response is so important "...am I my brother's keeper?" These words speak so clearly to our society today and how we react to those members of society that seem less worthy. YES, we are our brother's keepers. All of humanity is entrusted to each of us so that we cann assure that the basic right of each individual is guaranteed -- the right to life. The right to have water, food, shelter, clothing, etc... are all tied to the one true right -- the right to life. How easy is it, in our society, to subjectify individiual situations and justify the killing of an individual. This is relativism; the understanding that their is no absolute but rather a belief that each situation is looked at with its own set of circumstances and a moral decision is reached after we look at all the facts. But God would say no, "we are our brother's keeper." Even more so we are the keepers of those who can not speak for themselves and we must speak for them and assure that their life is ALWAYS respected!

God then, after Cain admits to his crime against humanity, declares his justice. The earth which Cain relied on would no longer bear fruit for him. he would be forced to wander the earth as a vagrant. He would need to rely on the good will of others to survive. How ironic, he who took the life of another would now have to rely on the good of others to himself survive. He would be required to depend on others valuing his life more than he valued his brother's.

Cain can not bear this and almost wishes death upon himself. He tells God that those that see him will kill him. They will see the sin that he committed and take justice into their own hands. The death of Cain would be justice -- it would be appropriate vengance. That is what our society would say. The death penalty is called for more and more in our society, in our country. Anytime their is a crime consider exceptionally gross, (beyond repose) the cries for death grow louder. But I ask you isn't death death? Why is the life of a 7 year old more valuable than that of 32 year old or a 73 year old. Why do we cry out for the death penalty more when the 7 yeaar old is murdered but less when the 32 year old is murdered? That is relativisim.

What does God do? What does he say about death is this situation? God says “Not so! Whoever kills Cain will suffer a sevenfold vengeance.” And the Lord put a mark on Cain, so that no one who came upon him would kill him. God makes it clear that we are not to inact our own vengance. Cain is not to be killed and he marks Cain so that anyone that comes in contact with Cain would know not to kill him. We do not have the right to take the life of an individual. Life is the one and only human right that needs to be protected at all expense. Even when death seems like a just and appropriate vengance.

The story of Cain and Abel sets up the foundation for all teaching on life. It is the cornerstone that guarantees life to the unborn, the disabled, the old, the medically fragile. It guarantees life to the criminals and the drudges of society. And it tells all that Yes, we are our brother's keepers. We are to at all expense, stand up for life and not be ok with a society that devalues anyones life. We are the voice for the ultimate morale absolute. Life is the moral absolute and needs to be absolutely protected from conception to a natural death.

A Goodnight Prayer

2009-08-24T22:56:00.000-04:00

A Goodnight Prayer

by Bernard Hassan

As this day now quickly ends

I pray, my words today did not offend.

God, my Father, please give me sweet rest;

So in the morning I can do my best:

To praise You through all I say and do

So through me they can only see You.

Heavenly Father; Only Begotten Son

Holy Spirit; Three in One.

I ask YOU now to look over all whom I Love

Grant them peace and Hold them with a great big hug.

-----AMEN

Saw a GREAT movie -- Forever Strong

2009-08-24T10:48:00.002-04:00

Official Forever Strong trailer

On the recommendation of a Facebook friend the family watched an excellent movie last night. Forever Strong. Below is my first attempt at a movie review. We watched it on the Netflix instant watch feature.

If you have had the chance to see the 1938 classic Boys Town then I'm sure you remember the on-screen relationship between Spencer Tracy's (Oscar winning) Father Flanagan and Mickey Rooney's Whitey Marsh. Forever Young provides a similar dynamic -- call it taming of the shrew -- at the core of this fact based sports drama.

Rugby, in this movie, is the the redemption setting for the would be tough guy.

Rick, the reckless teen, played by a young "Tom Cruise like" Sean Faris, crumbles under the pressure from his overbearing father, Richard (Neal McDonough) who is also his coach. Rick deals with this pressure by drinking himself into a good mood. After totaling his car and seriously injuring his girlfriend Rick is convicted of a second DUI before age 18 and is sentenced to a juvenile detention center for six months.

At the detention center Rick is offered early release by Marcus (Sean Astim), the humane warden, if he can win and keep a spot on the local rugby team, Highland Rugby. Highland Rugby is coached by Larry Gekwix (Gary Cole), a strict coach who holds his athletes to unusually exacting standards both on and off the field. These standards include dressing formally, abstaining from alcohol and drugs, behaving respectfully towards young woman and doing charity work for a nearby hospital. "Do nothing that brings disgrace to you, your team or your family." is their code of conduct.

As Rick eventually discovers, the charismatic Gelwix, who spends most of each practice on the sidelines talking with players one-on-one, has the uncanny ability to extract voluntary confessions from transgressors, as well as their docile acceptance of a penalty. By emphasizing their emotional and psychological development, Gelwix hopes to make his proteges "forever strong."

Steeped in his father's combative ethic, Rick is initially unimpressed and concerned exclusively with his own performance. But Gelwix and his players are stubbornly determined to win over the loner.

In between scenes of arduous play, which may appeal mainly to established rugger fans, director Ryan Little's coming-of-age tale offers an uplifting study in true maturity, self-possessed masculinity and dedicated sportsmanship. The moral idealism on display here, which has helped Gelwix's real-life Highland rugby team garner 18 national title, make this movie character-enhancing entertainment for pre-teens and up.

Asked my boys what the movies message was"

Anthony -- age 8 "Don't embarrass yourself, your family or your team."

Nathaniel -- age 14 "The movie was about no drinking, no smoking, no cheating. Family and team is what counts."

Massachusetts General Hospital to begin program for Adults with Autism

2009-08-23T16:24:00.000-04:00

This is a great article in The Boston Globe about a new program that will be beginning for Adults with Autism. Very encouraging!!!! Please read the article.http://www.boston.com/news/health/articles/2009/08/23/mgh_to_target_adult_autism/

Dogs In School

2009-08-22T19:22:00.001-04:00

School Fight Familes Over Autism Service Dogs

The above article discusses what is going to be a new line in the battle to gain appropriate access for children with Autism. Service dogs were once only used as seeing asistance dogs for the blind but with research has come many new uses for these animals. They are now trained to help children and adults with many different dissabilities. I have listed many (but not all) of the current uses below.

Many people have seen Guide dogs in their daily lives, guiding their handlers expertly around obstacles and across streets. There are, however, dogs that help someone who is deaf, in a wheelchair, using crutches, and for many other disabilities. These dogs are all protected by the ADA and the fact that schools are challenging their acceptance into the schools is sad. It is just another hurdle that the schools put in the way of these children obtaining appropriate access to their schools an educational opportunities.

The main types of Assistance Dogs (called Service Dogs in the Americans with Disabilities Act and many laws), are:

Guide Dogs:

Probably the most familiar type of service dog is the guide dog that is trained to help blind or visually impaired people. These dogs serve as the eyes for their owner, navigating them through traffic, stairs and sidewalks while avoiding all obstacles that could cause injury.

Hearing Dogs:

Similar to guide dogs, "hearing" or "signal" dogs are specially trained to assist deaf people. They alert their owner to sounds, usually by approaching their owner and then by going back to the source of the sound. They signal such noises as doorbells, phones, smoke alarms, crying babies, microwave bells and even tea kettles whistling. These dogs have the same access privileges as guide dogs and are permitted in all public and private facilities.

Service Dogs:

Service Dog is the catch all term for any dog that helps a physically or mentally disabled person. You have the following catagories:

Mobility Assist Dog: Pulls a person's wheelchair, carries things in a backpack, picks up things a person drops, opens/closes doors, helps the handler get dressed or undressed.

Walker Dog: Helps the handler walk by balancing or acting as a counter balance. Does many of the tasks that the Mobility Assist Dog does.

Seizure Alert/Response Dog: This dog is trained to respond to a person's seizures and either stay with the person, or go get help. Some dogs are trained to hit a button on a console to automatically dial 911. When the dog hears the voice over the speaker, the dog starts barking. The disabled person would have arranged that the system is dog activated.

Psychiatric Service Dog: A person with a mental disability may need a dog to be able to go out in public (agraphobic), or may be autistic and need the dog to keep them focused. These dogs are trained NEVER to leave their handler's side.

SsigDog: A dog trained to assist a person with autism. The dog alerts the partner to distracting repetitive movements common among those with autism, allowing the person to stop the movement (e.g., hand flapping). A person with autism may have problems with sensory input and need the same support services from a dog that a dog might give to a person who is blind or deaf.

Combo Dog: Some programs, Paws With A Cause, for example, have started training dogs for people with multiple disabilities, like a guide/mobility assist dog.

The US Justice Department makes the following information available to all business owners with regard to service animals.

U.S. Department of Justice
Civil Rights Division
Disability Rights Section
7/96
1. Q. What are the laws that apply to my business?
A. Under the Americans with Disabilities (ADA), privately owned businesses that serve the public, such as restaurants, hotels, retail stores, taxicabs, theaters, concert halls, and sports facilities, are prohibited from discriminating against individuals with disabilities. The ADA requires these businesses to allow people with disabilities to bring their service animals onto business premises in whatever areas customers are generally allowed.

2. Q. What is a service animal?
A. The ADA defines a service animal as ANY guide dog, signal dog, or other animal individually trained to provide assistance to an individual with a disability. If they meet this definition, animals are considered service animals under the ADA regardless of whether they have been licensed or certified by a State or local government.
Service animals perform some of the functions and tasks that the individual with a disability cannot perform for him or herself. "Seeing eye dogs" are one type of service animal, used by some individuals who are blind. This is the type of service animal most people are familiar with. But there are service animals that assist persons with other kinds of disabilities in their day-to-day activities. Some examples include:
* Alerting persons with hearing impairments to sounds.
* Pulling wheelchairs or carrying and picking up things for persons with mobility impairments.
* Assisting persons with mobility impairments with balance.
A service animal is NOT a pet.

3. Q. How can I tell if an animal is really a service animal and not just a pet?
A. Some, but not all, service animals wear special collars and harnesses. Some, but not all, are licensed or certified and have identification papers. If you are not certain that an animal is a service animal, you may ask the person who has the animal if it is a service animal required because of a disability. However, an individual who is going to a restaurant or theater is not likely to be carrying documentation of his or her medical condition or disability. Therefore, such documentation generally may not be required as a condition for providing service to an individual accompanied by a service animal. Although a number of states have programs to certify service animals, you may not insist on proof of state certification before permitting the service animal to accompany the person with a disability.

4. Q. What must I do when an individual with a service animal comes to my business?
A. The service animal must be permitted to accompany the individual with a disability to all areas of the facility where customers are normally allowed to go. An individual with a service animal may not be segregated from other customers.

5. Q. I have always had a clearly posted "no pets" policy at my establishment. Do I still have to allow service animals in?
A. Yes. A service animal is NOT a pet. The ADA requires you to modify your "no pets" policy to allow the use of a service animal by a person with a disability. This does not mean you must abandon your "no pets" policy altogether but simply that you must make an exception to your general rule for service animals.

6. Q. My county health department has told me that ONLY a seeing eye dog has to be admitted. If I follow those regulations, am I violating the ADA?
A. Yes, if you refuse to admit any other type of service animal on the basis of local health department regulations or other state or local laws. The ADA provides greater protection for individuals with disabilities and so it takes priority over the local or state laws or regulations.

7. Q. Can I charge a maintenance or cleaning fee for customers who bring service animals into my business?
A. No. Neither a deposit nor a surcharge may be imposed on an individual with a disability as a condition to allowing a service animal to accompany the individual with a disability, even if deposits are routinely required for pets. However, a public accommodation may charge its customers with disabilities if a service animal causes damage so long as it is the regular practice of the entity to charge non-disabled customers for the same types of damages. For example, a hotel can charge a guest with a disability for the cost of repairing or cleaning furniture damaged by a service animal if it is the hotel's policy to charge when non-disabled guests cause such damage.

8. Q. I operate a private taxicab and I don't want animals in my taxi; they smell, shed hair and sometimes have "accidents." Am I violating the ADA if I refuse to pick up someone with a service animal?
A. Yes. Taxicab companies may not refuse to provide services to individuals with disabilities. Private taxicab companies are also prohibited from charging higher fares or fees for carrying individuals with disabilities and their service animals than they charge to other persons for the same or equivalent service.

9. Q. Am I responsible for the animal while the person with a disability is in my business?
A. No. The care or supervision of a service animal is solely the responsibility of his or her owner. You are not required to provide care or food or a special location for the animal.

10. Q. What if a service animal barks or growls at other people, or otherwise acts out of control?
A. You may exclude any animal, including a service animal, from your facility when that animal's behavior poses a direct threat to the health or safety of others. For example, any service animal that displays vicious behavior towards other guests or customers may be excluded. You may not make assumptions, however, about how a particular animal is likely to behave based on your past experience with other animals. Each situation must be considered individually.
Although a public accommodation may exclude any service animal that is out of control, it should give the individual with a disability who uses the service animal the option of continuing to enjoy its goods and services without having the service animal on the premises.

11. Q. Can I exclude an animal that doesn't really seem dangerous but is disruptive to my business?
A. There may be a few circumstances when a public accommodation is not required to accommodate a service animals - that is, when doing so would result in a fundamental alteration to the nature of the business. Generally, this is not likely to occur in restaurants, hotels, retail stores, theaters, concert halls, and sports facilities. But when it does, for example, when a dog barks during a movie, the animal can be excluded.

If you have further questions about service animals or other requirements of the ADA, you may call the U.S. Department of Justice's toll-free ADA Information Line at 800-514-0301 (voice) or 800-514-0383 (TDD).

Attacking our Children!!!

2009-08-22T16:06:00.004-04:00

I wrote earlier about a movement in Great Britain for legalized Euthanasia. Proponents of this legislation include the Royal College of Obstetrics and Gynecology. In contrast the The Royal College of Physicians and the Royal College of General Practitioners believe it should remain illegal.

Currently two nations have legalized Euthanasia, Holland and Belgium and it is practiced so readily that it is advisable to carry a "Do Not Euthanize Card" in your wallet the same way you carry an Organ Donor Card in case you wind up in an Emergency Room. Also, many from other European nations flock to these two countries to receive the services.

In the United States Legalized Euthanasia is for the most part illegal; however in Montana on December 5, 2008, state District Court judge Dorothy McCarter ruled terminally ill patients have the right to self-administer lethal doses of medication as prescribed by a physician. Physicians who prescribe such medications will not face legal punishment. In 1994 the residents of Oregon voted in the Death with Dignity Act, which legalized physician-assisted suicide with certain restrictions. Texas, in 1999, passed the Texas Futile Care Law, which gives Texas hospitals and physicians the right to withdraw life-support measures when they are considered to be futile and inappropriate. In 2005, six-month old, Sun Hudson, became the first pediatric patient in which a United States court has allowed life-sustaining treatment to be withdrawn from a pediatric patient over the objections of the child's parent. Sun had thanatophoric dysplasia. Washington state made physician assisted suicide legal in 2008.

Canada is currently considering legalized Euthanasia. Please pray that this is defeated as it has in all previous attempts. Leading the charge against this legislation is Archbishop Richard Smith, Diocese of Edmonton. (I have printed his letter to his people for your reading).

Who are the targets of these measures? Normally they are the elderly or the disabled. In fact in Great Britain it is proposed as a way to reduce the unnecessary care for severely disabled children; also they say that it could reduce abortions because parents who abort a child because it may be disabled would now be able to bring the child into the world and if he/she is truly disabled they could now kill him/her. If not disabled keep him/her. Those of us raising Special Needs children know that with all the frustration and trials the joy that they bring to our life's is endless and always growing.

Also, continue to pray that the USA never commits the grave sin of legalized national Euthanasia to join the grave sin of legalized national Abortion. And continue to pray for the repeal of all Abortion laws.

Please join me in the following prayer.

Prayer for All People

Lord of Life, We give you praise because all we know of You speaks of life, and goodness, and blessing. Yet, as we look at Your world, we are stricken with grief that so often we seem to see more that relates to death than to life. In the midst of such a world, help us to so order our lives that they will in turn express Your life.

Give us concern for the unborn dead, whom people have destined to be that for their own convenience through an injection, a pill, or a knife. Give us concern also for the living dead, those, who through want of food, medicine, or the lack of someone to care, are dead while they live. And, Lord, give us concern for the dying dead, those whose lives are almost spent here on earth.

Deliver us from seeing any of these people as a responsibility to be avoided or a burden to be lifted from our shoulders. Instead, let us view each issue, and especially each person, as an opportunity for You to express Your life in us. Give us to be as incensed with wrong as You are, but help us also to influence our society and our fellows through our gracious words and firm stands. Above all Lord, enable us to reach out to those in need whom we can personally help, lest our profession of love be only sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal. Through him who taught us to love - Jesus Christ of Nazareth. Amen.

Pastor William F. Stiemann

Letter from Archbishop Smith

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

I am writing to you on a matter of grave urgency that affects all of us.

A private member’s bill has been introduced in the federal House of Commons by MP Francine Lalonde of the Bloc Quebecois. Labelled Bill C-384, it seeks to amend the Criminal Code of Canada so that euthanasia and assisted suicide would become legal in this country. It is scheduled for debate in Parliament on September 29th of this year. As Roman Catholics we have a serious responsibility to speak out in defense of the precious gift of human life whenever it is threatened. Therefore, I am asking that you become informed on this issue and to contact your Member of Parliament. Let him or her know that such a law would be morally unacceptable and unworthy of our country.

By euthanasia is meant the deliberate killing of a person by action (e.g. lethal injection) or omission (e.g. withholding medically indicated treatment), with the purpose of eliminating suffering. As a direct and intended termination of human life, it is immoral and not permissible.

Euthanasia is very different from respecting one’s request not to have treatment or to withdraw treatment when the burdens it brings outweigh any benefits. These decisions are acceptable from a moral viewpoint. It is also to be distinguished from those situations where medication is administered to relieve pain and suffering, even when it is foreseen that this might shorten the patient’s life. Provided that this medication is given with the sole intent of relieving pain, and not with the intention of ending life, it is morally permissible.

Assisted suicide is assistance given by a third party to a person to kill himself or herself (e.g. by providing pills). As such it is cooperation in an action which is objectively wrong, and is therefore itself an immoral act.

Many today will try to argue that either euthanasia or assisted suicide is a “compassionate” response to suffering. We must not allow such misuse of language to blind us to the fact that the indisputable issue at the heart of these practices is the killing of another human being.

True compassion calls us to stand with our suffering brothers and sisters and affirm that they are always a gift and never a burden; that their lives are at every moment worthwhile and never without meaning. As life nears its natural end, the compassionate response to any pain and hardship is good palliative care, not the killing of the patient.

The common good of any society depends upon the commitment of all citizens to uphold the dignity of every human life at each moment and circumstance. The legalization of euthanasia and assisted suicide in Canada would be a major social failure.

I encourage you to contact your local Member of Parliament and insist that euthanasia and assisted suicide not be legalized in Canada.

Yours sincerely in Christ,

Richard W. Smith
Archbishop of Edmonton

Communal Prayer do we Discriminate?

2009-08-21T17:46:00.001-04:00

I've wanted to write about this subject but have hesitated knowing that it may solicit some strong opinions, but if my desire is for dialogue strong opinions is often the best way to get the dialogue started.

The Catholic Church divides prayer into two types. Communal Prayer and Personal prayer/reflection. At its basic core Communal Prayer is when 2 or more are gathered in Jesus' name and personal prayer/reflection is when an individual takes time to talk with God one on one. We need both and the two are forever interconnected. Jesus shows us in the Bible the necessity for both. Jesus taking time in the dessert and going off by himself to pray was his time to talk with his Father. This is where he gained strength to then bring his Father to the crowds through his teaching, healing, and witness.

As a Church we have deemphasized both Communal and Personal prayer, I am afraid. Or, we try to have one without the other. I have heard many people say one of the following; "I don't need to go to Church I talk with God every day." and I hear "I go to Church each week. That's good enough, I don't have time to pray each day." I want to focus, for today's discussion on why both are necessary, and because we are no longer fostering a culture of both we are fostering a culture of discrimination even though we do not intend to.

Communal prayer for most Catholics is the Divine Liturgy (Mass). But, it also is Reconciliation Services, Benediction of the Blessed Sacrament, and other prayer services and group devotions.
Its primary purpose (no matter which form we are using) is to gather the faithful so as a group they can give Praise and Thanksgiving to our God. Commemorate our God. And intercede to our God. It is not a time for internal growing with God but rather for an external Praising of God (we externally express our internal relationship).

Personal prayer is where we develop our relationship with Our Lord and Savior. We develop a relationship with our Heavenly Father and we develop a relationship with the Holy Spirit. As Catholics we also develop a relationship with Mary and the saints; asking them to go to the throne room to bring our prayers and petitions to Jesus. We build these relationships through Bible reading, devotional reading, mediation, and many times just conversing like we would with any friend or family member (to name a few ways). It is here in this alone time that we are strengthened as Catholics. It is here that we receive God's grace, and direction. It is here that we are given the energy we need to bring to communal prayer; so that we can join with all the other believers in and external time of Praise, Thanksgiving, Worship, and Intercession.

So, you are probably asking how is Communal Prayer taking on a form of discrimination? The Catholic Church is very ritualistic, and that is ok. There is a strict form to each communal prayer service -- some stricter than others but they all have a form and structure that is followed. But, communal prayer is suppose to be a time when all in the community of believers (congregation, prayer group, whatever) can gather and lift up their hearts to the Lord. Ask yourself; in your Church can a child or adult with Developmental Disabilities do that? We make accommodations for those with physical disabilities. We build ramps, install elevators, and offer special seating. We provide braille and sign language. We print the readings so those hard of hearing can read along. But what do we do to welcome the Developmentally Disabled?

They are prone to random noises, to hand fluttering and jumping. They may be inclined to run around, walk on their toes or repeat a phrase over and over. They may yell out at an inopportune time. What do we do to make them feel welcome? In and earlier posting I wrote about a priest that asked us not to return. I have been asked to use a crying room for my child, now 14. Crying rooms are great for infants but for any school age child they are awful. They are normally in the back of the church where a child can not see. In many, you can barely hear the liturgy and it is socially stigmatizing. The child is made to feel like an outsider, like they don't belong. And for many they can not control their behavior any more than a blind person can control being blind. Why then are we isolating them for something they can not control?

Communal prayer is not a time for personal prayer/reflection. Yes, we can grow from it. Yes we can be educated during it but it does not have to be neat and orderly to the discrimination of some. Parents and their children need to feel that the congregation will not shun them. They need to feel welcomed and their children need to feel that they belong. It is hard to bring a Developmentally Disabled child many places. The looks, the remarks, the outright hostility sometimes shown makes parents want to cocoon their child at home where all is safe. Wouldn't it be nice if the Church was the one place where they always felt welcome? Wouldn't it be nice if communal prayer became a time to educate? Wouldn't it be nice if we as Christians brought into the restaurants, movie theaters, libraries, schools etc... a welcoming attitude that we developed through attending times of Communal Prayer?

Why me?

2009-08-19T21:49:00.006-04:00

I am here! I am here Lord! I ask myself sometimes, why me? I did not prepare for this, why me? Me, I wanted to be a priest; to serve you at the Holy Altar but instead I serve you at the dining room table trying to keep the peace between four very different children. Why me?

Lord, I can remember when I met Theresa how I knew she was the one. I remember the dance at the orientation dance; she an RA and me an orientation leader (us both going into our senior year). I asked her to dance. Not me, what was I doing; but I did and we danced that night (it was just one dance but I knew). I didn't listen, but I knew. Why me Lord? I had been preparing myself for years -- seminary was the place for me.

2 months passed by and I never saw her. She must have walked past me a thousand times but I was blind. I would not see what was right in front of me. I continued to prep for seminary after graduation; then, one October night I went to a concert alone. I sat down and looked next to me it was her, she too went alone (something she'd tell me later she doesn't do.) As the concert ends we walk out together striking up conversation and I find myself asking her out. "Why me Lord? I don't do this." But, the words just flowed so easily and without pause she said yes.

4 months later we were inseparable. I could not see me without her and once again she said yes. At the Kiss of Peace during 8am Sunday Mass with Theresa by my side and my household brothers a few rows behind me trying to keep their composure and see what I was doing (she must have thought it strange this crew all at 8am Mass) I asked the question. And she said "Yes."

6 months after that I met her at the altar, so beautiful was she, Theresa Marie John Cooney. I will forever remember how she looked that day. She was radiant, she glowed and I didn't know why she would marry me. I never imagined my self with someone as gorgeous as Theresa Marie. In my head I asked on that altar and the night before, "why me Lord? This time a priest, a good friend, Fr. Tony Salim asked a question of her and she said "I do." She left the altar that day Theresa Marie John Hassan. Why me Lord, why me?

9 months later (a month earlier than the Dr's had planned) Nathaniel Jacob blessed us with a joy I did not know could exist. He was such a precious gift from God and I remember being afraid I'd break him. Why me? I can't be ready for this.

13 months later Rebecca Ann, our family was growing all from the Master's hands.

15 months more than Julia Marie, a precious girl, we now had three. "Why me" I asked "can I do it?" not without Him who lead me to it.

3 years went buy and then Anthony Michael, how we needed him even though we still don't fully know it.

God's plan for me it was not my own; a wife and 4 precious children to call my own. Each day I pray and kneel before You my Lord and Savior, my Mastor Creator. I still ask "why me, am I up to it?" and still You answer "trust in Me you can do it."

There will be many more milestones abd challenges I have yet to mention, Lord I know it, and I still will question. I'm in awe of this life, but YOU called me too it.

Theresa is and always will be the one I'll love for as long as my Earthly body allows of me. And then in heaven I pray to thee that I can hold her for all eternity.

Happy 15th Anniversary my one and only true love, the only woman I ever kissed, Theresa Marie John (Conney) Hassan.

Bernard and Theresa Hassan -- August 20th, 1994

He can dance!!!

2009-08-19T15:16:00.009-04:00

Nathaniel and Rebecca have practice tonight giving me inspiration to get positive. Last year, Nathaniel joined the High School Youth Group at church (MYO - Maronite Youth Organization). This has been a positive experience for Nathaniel and I have more to write in the future. Today I want to focus on his current preparations to dance at the church festival.

Dance?? For any of you who know Nathaniel you know that Nathaniel hates to move. He is a bit of a "slug" at times. That is due to poor muscle tone and the fact that he is prone to Heat Stroke so he hates to go outside -- He says that the sun makes him sick. And if I am being honest he also has a "lazy streak' in him.

This year his sister, Rebecca, was old enough to join the MYO and her first activity will be dancing and working at the Mahrajan (festival). Our church is very much an ethnic church and because we are Maronite the church membership is almost exclusively of Lebanese descent (with many members being 1st generation immigrants from Lebanon). Entwined in our Liturgy, Festivals and other social functions is almost always a touch, taste and/or look of Lebanon (whether it be food, language, music, dancing, etc....)

For a month now a group of High School youth have been meeting to learn two traditional Lebanese Folk Tunes that they will dance too at the Mahrajan (when not dancing they will be helping to "man" the Children's games/activity area of the festival). This has involved practicing 2-3 days/week for 90 minutes. This two day event is our Church's largest fundraiser and it provides an opportunity for us to both gather as a church community; both regular attendees and extenbded. It also is a great opportunity for us to share a bit of our Lebanese flavor with the people of Lawrence, Ma (where the church is) and the surrounding area.

Nathaniel has been welcomed with open arms even though it is much harder for him to learn and master the dance steps. His sister has been a huge help, helping him practice at home and he has made progress.

Nathaniel has NEVER been able to hop with two feet (together), NEVER!!! That is a very intricate part of the dances. At age 14, Nathaniel has finally learned how to do this (so much for the studies out there that contend, this population can not acquire new skills past age 12.) All the PT, Adaptive PE, ABA and school and family interaction has failed to produce this result. Nothing had been been able to crack this; but, wanting to dance with the teenagers at HIS church has. Praise God!!!

Nathaniel enjoys going to practice and is trying really hard to interact socially with the boys when they have breaks. The MYO has been a wonderful place for Nathaniel and we look forward to the years ahead (I will write more in the future about the MYO and Nathaniel) I also would be amiss if I did not thank Coco (sp?), one of the advisors, and her huge smile which Nathaniel talks about often, (Coco you make Nathaniel feel welcomed --Thank You).

Those of you, in the area, please consider coming by and seeing Nathaniel, his sister Rebecca, and the other MYO members in full costume participating with the St. Anthony Youth Dabke Troupe. Below is some info for the event. I will be sure to post specific times as to when they will dance Saturday and Sunday as the date draws closer and if I can figure out how to; I will be sure to post a video, after the event, for those who can't come.

Dabke (Arabic: دبكة; also transliterated dabka, and dabkeh) is the most popular Arab folk dance in Jordan, Lebanon, Syria and in Palestine.

Saint Anthony's
ANNUAL MAHRAJAN
September 5-6, 2009
Saint Anthony Maronite Church
1145 Amesbury Street
Lawrence, MA 01841
978-685-7233
http://www.stanthonylawrence.org/

Our annual Mahrajan (Festival) will be held on Labor Day weekend as always, on Saturday and Sunday, September 5th and 6th. This announcement is for all of us to save the date and also to spread the good word to our patrons, friends, and guests. Our hope is to have a successful and fruitful Mahrajan where we can express our hospitality to all those who come to enjoy the day and be enriched with the friendship and camaraderie of each other. Everyone is most welcome to come forward and share their talents, efforts, and volunteer their time as we prepare and work together for the same purpose.

A What???????

2009-08-18T17:46:00.003-04:00

Above is the founder of The Maronite Church -- St. Maron.

I am a member of the Maronite Church in The Antiochian (Syrian) Rite of the One Universal Apostolic Catholic Church. That is a mouthful that causes many to scratch their heads and look at me and say "a what?????"

My children are also members and thus when we discuss Religious Education that is where I am coming from. However, I have also been a DRE and Youth Minister in a "regular" Latin Rite Church and have a wealth of experience there also. I am also a graduate of Franciscan University of Steubenville where my depth and understanding of the Latin Rite and her devotions was strengthened. It is important that you understand that I am not part of the Latin (Roman) Rite but I am fully Catholic. Some of my terminology (such as Mystery instead of Sacrament) will sound foreign to Catholics forget about non-Catholics (I will try to be cognizant to this.)

As I thought more and more about this I decided that it would be appropriate to post a piece on Catholic Rites and Churches. Since this is not the focus of my blog, yet an important thing to understand me and where I am coming from I am going to insert a wonderful piece on this that I found on EWTN in their expert answers section. It is simple but thorough and I hope will be a great source of education into the richness of the Catholic Church.

CATHOLIC RITES AND CHURCHES

Christ, having been lifted up from the earth has drawn all men to Himself. Rising from the dead He sent His life–giving Spirit upon His disciples and through Him has established His Body which is the Church as the universal sacrament of salvation. Sitting at the right hand of the Father, He is continually active in the world that He might lead men to the Church and through it join them to Himself and that He might make them partakers of His glorious life by nourishing them with His own Body and Blood. [Vatican Council II, Dogmatic Constitution on the Church Lumen gentium 48]

RITES

A Rite represents an ecclesiastical, or church, tradition about how the sacraments are to be celebrated. Each of the sacraments has at its core an essential nature which must be satisfied for the sacrament to be confected or realized. This essence – of matter, form and intention – derives from the divinely revealed nature of the particular sacrament. It cannot be changed by the Church. Scripture and Sacred Tradition, as interpreted by the Magisterium, tells us what is essential in each of the sacraments (2 Thes. 2:15).

When the apostles brought the Gospel to the major cultural centers of their day the essential elements of religious practice were inculturated into those cultures. This means that the essential elements were clothed in the symbols and trappings of the particular people, so that the rituals conveyed the desired spiritual meaning to that culture. In this way the Church becomes all things to all men that some might be saved (1 Cor. 9:22).

There are three major groupings of Rites based on this initial transmission of the faith, the Roman, the Antiochian (Syria) and the Alexandrian (Egypt). Later on the Byzantine derived as a major Rite from the Antiochian, under the influence of St. Basil and St. John Chrysostom. From these four derive the over 20 liturgical Rites present in the Church today.

CHURCHES

A Church is an assembly of the faithful, hierarchically ordered, both in the entire world – the Catholic Church, or in a certain territory – a particular Church. To be a sacrament (a sign) of the Mystical Body of Christ in the world, a Church must have both a head and members (Col. 1:18). The sacramental sign of Christ the Head is the sacred hierarchy – the bishops, priests and deacons (Eph. 2:19–22). More specifically, it is the local bishop, with his priests and deacons gathered around and assisting him in his office of teaching, sanctifying and governing (Mt. 28:19–20; Titus 1:4–9). The sacramental sign of the Mystical Body is the Christian faithful. Thus the Church of Christ is fully present sacramentally (by way of a sign) wherever there is a sign of Christ the Head, a bishop and those who assist him, and a sign of Christ's Body, Christian faithful. Each diocese is therefore a particular Church.

The Church of Christ is also present sacramentally in ritual Churches that represent an ecclesiastical tradition of celebrating the sacraments. They are generally organized under a Patriarch, who together with the bishops and other clergy of that ritual Church represent Christ the Head to the people of that tradition. In some cases a Rite is completely coincident with a Church. For example, the Maronite Church with its Patriarch has a Rite not found in any other Church. In other cases, such as the Byzantine Rite, several Churches use the same or a very similar liturgical Rite. For example, the Ukrainian Catholic Church uses the Byzantine Rite, but this Rite is also found in other Catholic Churches, as well as the Eastern Orthodox Churches not in union with Rome.

Finally, the Church of Christ is sacramentally present in the Universal or Catholic Church spread over the entire world. It is identified by the sign of Christ our Rock, the Bishop of Rome, Successor of St. Peter (Mt. 16:18). To be Catholic particular Churches and ritual Churches must be in communion with this Head, just as the other apostles, and the Churches they founded, were in communion with Peter (Gal. 1:18). Through this communion with Peter and his successors the Church becomes a universal sacrament of salvation in all times and places, even to the end of the age (Mt. 28:20).

Western Rites and Churches

Immediately subject to the Bishop of Rome, the Supreme Pontiff, who exercises his authority over the liturgy through the Congregation for Divine Worship and the Discipline of the Sacraments.

ROMAN/LATIN FAMILY OF LITURGICAL RITES
The Church of Rome is the Primatial See of the world and one of the five Patriarchal Sees of the early Church (Rome, Constantinople, Alexandria, Antioch and Jerusalem). Founded by St. Peter in 42 AD it was consecrated by the blood of Sts. Peter and Paul during the persecution of Nero (63–67 AD). It has maintained a continual existence since then and is the source of a family of Rites in the West. Considerable scholarship (such as that of Fr. Louis Boyer in Eucharist) suggests the close affinity of the Roman Rite proper with the Jewish prayers of the synagogue, which also accompanied the Temple sacrifices. While the origin of the current Rite, even in the reform of Vatican II, can be traced directly only to the 4th century, these connections point to an ancient apostolic tradition brought to that city that was decidedly Jewish in origin.

After the Council of Trent it was necessary to consolidate liturgical doctrine and practice in the face of the Reformation. Thus, Pope St. Pius V imposed the Rite of Rome on the Latin Church (that subject to him in his capacity as Patriarch of the West), allowing only smaller Western Rites with hundreds of years of history to remain. Younger Rites of particular dioceses or regions ceased to exist.

As a consequence of the Second Vatican Council's Dogmatic Constitution on the Sacred Liturgy, Pope Paul VI undertook a reform of the Mass of the Roman Rite, promulgating a revised rite with the Missal of 1970. This Missal has since been modified twice (1975 and 2002). Mass celebrated in accordance with this missal is the Ordinary Form of the Roman Rite.

At the time of the revised Missal's promulgation in 1970 almost all Catholics assumed that the previous rite, that of the Missal of 1962, had been abolished. By decision of the Supreme Pontiff Benedict XVI this general assumption has been declared false and the right of Latin Rite priests to celebrate Mass according to the former missal has been affirmed (Apostolic Letter Summorum Pontificum, 7 July 2007). Mass celebrated in accordance with the Missal of 1962 constitutes the Extraordinary Form of the Roman Rite.

• Roman – The overwhelming majority of Latin Catholics and of Catholics in general.
– Ordinary Form of the Roman Rite. Mass celebrated in accordance with the Missale Romanum of 1970, promulgated by Pope Paul VI, currently in its third edition (2002). The vernacular editions of this Missal, as well as the rites of the other sacraments, are translated from the Latin typical editions revised after the Second Vatican Council.
– Extraordinary Form of the Roman Rite. Mass celebrated in accordance with the Missale Romanum of 1962, promulgated by Blessed Pope John XXIII. The other sacraments are celebrated according to the Roman Ritual in force at the time of the Second Vatican Council. The Extraordinary Form is most notable for being almost entirely in Latin. In addition to institutes which have the faculty to celebrate the Extraordinary Form routinely, such as the Priestly Fraternity of St. Peter and the Institute of Christ the King Sovereign Priest, any Latin Rite priest may now offer the Mass and other sacraments in accordance with norms of Summorum Pontificum.
– Anglican Use. Since the 1980s the Holy See has granted some former Anglican and Episcopal clergy converting with their parishes the faculty of celebrating the sacramental rites according to Anglican forms, doctrinally corrected.
• Mozarabic – The Rite of the Iberian peninsula (Spain and Portugal) known from at least the 6th century, but probably with roots to the original evangelization. Beginning in the 11th century it was generally replaced by the Roman Rite, although it has remained the Rite of the Cathedral of the Archdiocese of Toledo, Spain, and six parishes which sought permission to adhere to it. Its celebration today is generally semi–private.
• Ambrosian – The Rite of the Archdiocese of Milan, Italy, thought to be of early origin and probably consolidated, but not originated, by St. Ambrose. Pope Paul VI was from this Roman Rite. It continues to be celebrated in Milan, though not by all parishes.
• Bragan – Rite of the Archdiocese of Braga, the Primatial See of Portugal, it derives from the 12th century or earlier. It continues to be of occasional use.
• Dominican – Rite of the Order of Friars Preacher (OP), founded by St. Dominic in 1215.
• Carmelite – Rite of the Order of Carmel, whose modern foundation was by St. Berthold c.1154.
• Carthusian – Rite of the Carthusian Order founded by St. Bruno in 1084.

Eastern Rites and Churches

The Eastern Catholic Churches have their own hierarchy, system of governance (synods) and general law, the Code of Canons for the Eastern Churches. The Supreme Pontiff exercises his primacy over them through the Congregation for the Eastern Churches.

ANTIOCHIAN FAMILY OF LITURGICAL RITES
The Church of Antioch in Syria (the ancient Roman Province of Syria) is considered an apostolic See by virtue of having been founded by St. Peter. It was one of the ancient centers of the Church, as the New Testament attests, and is the source of a family of similar Rites using the ancient Syriac language (the Semitic dialect used in Jesus' time and better known as Aramaic). Its Liturgy is attributed to St. James and the Church of Jerusalem.

1. WEST SYRIAC
• Maronite – Never separated from Rome. Maronite Patriarch of Antioch. The liturgical language is Aramaic. The 3 million Maronites are found in Lebanon (origin), Cyprus, Egypt, Syria, Israel, Canada, US, Mexico, Brazil, Argentina and Australia.
• Syriac – Syriac Catholics who returned to Rome in 1781 from the monophysite heresy. Syriac Patriarch of Antioch. The 110,000 Syriac Catholics are found in Syria, Lebanon, Iraq, Egypt, Canada and the US.
• Malankarese – Catholics from the South of India evangelized by St. Thomas, uses the West Syriac liturgy. Reunited with Rome in 1930. Liturgical languages today are West Syriac and Malayalam. The 350,000 Malankarese Catholics are found in India and North America.

2. EAST SYRIAC
• Chaldean – Babylonian Catholics returned to Rome in 1692 from the Nestorian heresy. Patriarch of Babylon of the Chaldeans. Liturgical languages are Syriac and Arabic. The 310,000 Chaldean Catholics are found in Iraq, Iran, Syria, Lebanon, Egypt, Turkey and the US.
• Syro–Malabarese – Catholics from Southern India using the East Syriac liturgy. Returned to Rome in the 16th century from the Nestorian heresy. Liturgical languages are Syriac and Malayalam. Over 3 million Syro–Malabarese Catholics can be found in the state of Kerela, in SW India.

BYZANTINE FAMILY OF LITURGICAL RITES
The Church of Constantinople became the political and religious center of the eastern Roman Empire after the Emperor Constantine built a new capital there (324–330) on the site of the ancient town of Byzantium. Constantinople developed its own liturgical rite from the Liturgy of St. James, in one form as modified by St. Basil, and in a more commonly used form, as modified by St. John Chrysostom. After 1054, except for brief periods of reunion, most Byzantine Christians have not been in communion with Rome. They make up the Orthodox Churches of the East, whose titular head is the Patriarch of Constantinople. The Orthodox Churches are mostly auto–cephalous, meaning self–headed, united to each other by communion with Constantinople, which exercises no real authority over them. They are typically divided into Churches along nation lines. Those that have returned to communion with the Holy See are represented among the Eastern Churches and Rites of the Catholic Church.

1. ARMENIAN
Considered either its own Rite or an older version of the Byzantine. Its exact form is not used by any other Byzantine Rite. It is composed of Catholics from the first people to convert as a nation, the Armenians (N.E. of Turkey), and who returned to Rome at the time of the Crusades. Patriarch of Cilicia of the Armenians. The liturgical language is classical Armenian. The 350,000 Armenian Catholics are found in Armenia, Syria, Iran, Iraq, Lebanon, Turkey, Egypt, Greece, Ukraine, France, Romania, United States and Argentina. Most Armenians are Orthodox, not in union with Rome.

2. BYZANTINE
• Albanian – Albanian Christians, numbering only 1400 today, who resumed communion with Rome in 1628. Liturgical language is Albanian. Most Albanian Christians are Albanian Orthodox.
• Belarussian/Byelorussian – Unknown number of Belarussians who returned to Rome in the 17th century. The liturgical language is Old Slavonic. The faithful can be found in Belarus, as well as Europe, the Americas and Australia.
• Bulgarian – Bulgarians who returned to Rome in 1861. Liturgical language is Old Slavonic. The 20,000 faithful can be found in Bulgaria. Most Bulgarian Christians are Bulgarian Orthodox.
• Czech – Czech Catholics of Byzantine Rite organized into a jurisdiction in 1996.
• Krizevci – Croatian Catholics of Byzantine Rite who resumed communion with Rome in 1611. The liturgical language is Old Slavonic. The 50,000 faithful can be found in Croatia and the Americas. Most Croatians are Roman (Rite) Catholics.
• Greek – Greek Christians who returned to Rome in 1829. The liturgical language is Greek. Only 2500 faithful in Greece, Asia Minor (Turkey) and Europe. Greek Christians are almost all Orthodox, whose Patriarch is the Orthodox Patriarch of Constantinople.
• Hungarian – Descendants of Ruthenians who returned to Rome in 1646. The liturgical languages are Greek, Hungarian and English. The 300,000 faithful are found in Hungary, Europe and the Americas.
• Italo–Albanian – Never separated from Rome, these 60,000 Byzantine Rite Catholics are found in Italy, Sicily and the Americas. The liturgical languages are Greek and Italo–Albanian.
• Melkite – Catholics from among those separated from Rome in Syria and Egypt who resumed Communion with Rome at the time of the Crusades. However, definitive union only came in the 18th century. Melkite Greek Patriarch of Damascus. Liturgical languages are Greek, Arabic, English, Portuguese and Spanish. The over 1 million Melkite Catholics can be found in Syria, Lebanon, Jordan, Israel, Canada, US, Mexico, Brazil, Venezuela, Argentina and Australia.
• Romanian – Romanians who returned to Rome in 1697. The liturgical language is Romanian. There are over 1 million Romanian Catholics in Romania, Europe and the Americas. Most Romanian Christians are Romanian Orthodox.
• Russian – Russians who returned to communion with Rome in 1905. The liturgical language is Old Slavonic. An unknown number of the faithful in Russia, China, the Americas and Australia. Most Russian Christians are Russian Orthodox, whose Patriarch is the Orthodox Patriarch of Moscow.
• Ruthenian – Catholics from among those separated from Rome in Russia, Hungary and Croatia who reunited with Rome in 1596 (Brest–Litovsk) and 1646 (Uzhorod).
• Slovak – Byzantine Rite Catholics of Slovakian origin numbering 225,000 and found in Slovakia and Canada.
• Ukrainian – Catholics from among those separated from Rome by the Greek Schism and reunited about 1595. Patriarch or Metropolitan of Lviv. Liturgical languages are Old Slavonic and the vernacular. The 5.5 million Ukrainian Catholics can be found in Ukraine, Poland, England, Germany, France, Canada, US, Brazil, Argentina and Australia. During the Soviet era Ukrainian Catholics were violently forced to join the Ukrainian Orthodox Church. Their hierarchy, which continued to exist outside the homeland, has since been re–established in Ukraine.

ALEXANDRIAN FAMILY OF LITURGICAL RITES
The Church of Alexandria in Egypt was one of the original centers of Christianity, since like Rome and Antioch it had a large Jewish population which was the initial object of apostolic evangelization. Its Liturgy is attributed to St. Mark the Evangelist, and shows the later influence of the Byzantine Liturgy, in addition to its unique elements.

• Coptic – Egyptian Catholics who returned to communion with Rome in 1741. The Patriarch of Alexandria leads the 200,000 faithful of this ritual Church spread throughout Egypt and the Near East. The liturgical languages are Coptic (Egyptian) and Arabic. Most Copts are not Catholics.

• Ethiopian/Abyssinian – Ethiopian Coptic Christians who returned to Rome in 1846. The liturgical language is Geez. The 200,000 faithful are found in Ethiopia, Eritrea, Somalia, and Jerusalem.

revised 22 August 2007

Answered by Colin B. Donovan, STL

First Frustration preparing for First Commuion

2009-08-17T20:46:00.006-04:00

The Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, Apostles Creed, and an Act of Contrition. All prayers that I memorized as a child and use daily in my life as a practicing Catholic (well not the Act of Contrition -- but I use it often enough.) These prayers at the center of my life became a GREAT source of anger, frustration, a few heated arguments and more than a few prayer hours in tears when Nathaniel was preparing for First Commuion.

Nathaniel was in religious education for Kindergarten and First Grade with limited issues. I must admit that Kindergarten focused on Bible Stories, Bible Songs and social play time and Nathaniel was able to handle himself. First grade was a bit more of a challenge but the teacher (and helper) where seasoned and were able to keep him focused and provide breaks as necessary. They worked hard and Nathaniel had a good year.

Before Nathaniel entered 2nd grade (the First Communion year) we knew there would be issues. We had heard it would be a large class and we knew the classroom that Nathaniel was going to be in was small. This would not be good for Nathaniel, sensory overload was almost certain and his inability to read was going to be a problem.

As a Catholic I truly believe in the church's position that I (as parent) have the primary role in educating my child. Thank God that he chose a path for me different than the one I had desired and as a result I developed myself in Special Education. This gave me the basic preparation necessary to take an active role in Nathaniel's education both in secular school and in his religious formation (at home and with peers). Knowing that the year ahead would be difficult we took a preemptive approach. We did not want Nathaniel's nor his peer's preparation to be jeopardized by his inability to handle the situation he was going to be in. We decided to use some of the money provided by DMR (for helping Nathaniel socialize) to pay one of the High School Altar Boys to be Nathaniel's shadow. His role was to help keep him stay focused and provide him with breaks when necessary and to help him when reading was necessary; thus allowing the teacher and her assistance the ability to teach the WHOLE class.

Nathaniel had a tough year but he learned a lot. We were in awe at what he understood. In fact he understood so much in this preparation for First Confession and First Communion that it really changed our feelings about what he could understand. We learned through this learning experience that Nathaniel could grasp and explain (in his own way) concepts that most would say were beyond him - impossible. If only our pastor and the DRE felt that this was important the year would have been great. You see Nathaniel COULD NOT and still CAN NOT memorize.

Nathaniel was able to discuss that Jesus died. He expressed that Jesus died because he (Nathaniel) did bad things and other people did bad things. He told us that after Jesus died he fought the bad guy (Satan) then he was alive again. I remember one exact phrase "Jesus alive, I Heaven." He knew!! He really knew!!! Nathaniel told us Jesus had supper with his friends and now we get his Body and Blood not bread and wine. Nathaniel explained this to us, his teachers the DRE and our pastor. But we were told over and over throughout the year he would not be ready to receive First Communion. Why, you ask?

He could not recite from memory (and he couldn't read-- because that was offered as an alternative) the Our Father, Hail Mary, Glory Be, Apostles Creed, or the Act of Contrition. That was a requirement for First Communion and the requirement could not be changed. Over and over we and Nathaniel were made to feel like failures. The sad part is that all that Nathaniel could tell us about the Mysteries (sacraments) he was preparing for did not matter in determining if he was ready. Each child was TESTED by the DRE and/or pastor and the test was -- recite the prayers above from memory.

My wife and I, once again, saw this differently. My wife, wanting to protect Nathaniel, could not understand why I wouldn't just go somewhere else -- find another church where Nathaniel would be accepted for who he was. I did not want to be driven out of MY church, they (the pastor and DRE) needed to accept Nathaniel, understand Nathaniel and I was going to make it happen. (I did not see that we had many options. We are Maronite and going to a Latin church did not seem to be an option. Nathaniel needed to make these Mysteries in his birth right. Maybe I would have handled it differently if I was Latin and had other parishes to choose from).

The pastor and I had many discussions on the validity of this requirement, we butted heads for quite some time. In fact it was not till the week before First Communion that I knew he was going to be allowed to receive. It got to the point that I was constantly in a state of friction with my pastor and the program. The issue became more you are not going to persecute me and my child and not about Nathaniel and the Mysteries. I threatened to contact the Bishop and at one point my pastor got so upset with me voices were raised and he directed some choice words towards me. That's when I knew it had gone to far. I remember going to prayer and crying and at that moment I remembered St. Paschal.

I discussed in an earlier posting how Nathaniel and I would go to the Eucharistic Chapel late at night when he was a newborn. It was the one place that would silence his colic. He was at peace there. As a result we confirmed him Paschal after St. Paschal the patron saint of Eucharistic Societies (see bio below). In my tears I thought back to those nights together and prayed that St. Paschal intercede for Nathaniel so that he could partake in the Body and Blood of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

The next day we found out that Nathaniel was approved to receive both Mysteries!!! Thank you St. Paschal!!!

Over the years I've wondered what if I had fallen on my knees and trusted in prayer instead of my need for justice (as I saw it)? The years moving forward have not been easier, it's been very challenging but I am quicker to prayer now (yet I still have had some heated discussions).

I do want to say that the pastor here and the DRE are good people!! They did not understand Nathaniel and felt threatened by the situation I believe. I was not passionate and understanding enough. I did not educate with compassion instead I helped to create the friction. Nathaniel was the pawn being played by all.

My desire is not to "demonize" anyone but to begin discussion. I could have handled this better as well. How are we, parents, DREs, Priest, Religious, Cathaceist, etc... going to make religious education a welcoming experience for ALL children so they feel like they belong? How are we going to educate our children and congregations so that ALL the children of God are accepted? Those are the ultimate questions.
More to come.......

St. Pascal Baylon

Born at Torre-Hermosa, in the Kingdom of Aragon, 24 May, 1540, on the Feast of Pentecost, called in Spain "the Pasch of the Holy Ghost", whence the name Pascal; died at Villa Reale, 15 May, 1592, on Whitsunday. His parents, Martin Baylon and Elizabeth Jubera, were virtuous peasants. The child began very early to display signs of that surpassing devotion towards the Holy Eucharist, which forms the salient feature of his character. From his seventh to his twenty-fourth year, he led the life of a shepherd, and during the whole of that period exercised a salutary influence upon his companions. He was then received as a lay brother amongst the Franciscan friars of the Alcantarine Reform. In the cloister, Paschal's life of contemplation and self-sacrifice fulfilled the promise of his early years. His charity to the poor and afflicted, and his unfailing courtesy were remarkable. On one occasion, in the course of a journey through France, he triumphantly defended the dogma of the Real Presence against the blasphemies of a Calvinist preacher, and in consequence, narrowly escaped death at the hands of a Huguenot mob. Although poorly educated, his counsel was sought for by people of every station in life, and he was on terms of closest friendship with personages of eminent sanctity. Pascal was beatified in 1618, and canonized in 1690. His cultus has flourished particularly in his native land and in Southern Italy, and it was widely diffused in Southern and Central America, through the Spanish Conquests. In his Apostolic letter, Providentissimus Deus, Leo XIII declared St. Pascal the especial heavenly protector of all Eucharistic Congresses and Associations. His feast is kept on 17 May. The saint is usually depicted in adoration before a vision of the Host.

Religious Education -- A Tough Discussion

2009-08-16T18:41:00.002-04:00

Hello,

Today is just a teaser. This week I am going to attempt to begin a discussion on what it is like to raise a child in the church through religious education. I will be sharing from our experiences with Nathaniel and from other stories that have been shared with me through the years; also, I am encouraging anyone with positive and/or negative experiences with religious education and their special needs child to share them through the comment section. Hopefully this can be the beginning of an ongoing discussion to grow the church.

My kids are clueless.

2009-08-14T07:17:00.005-04:00

My kids are clueless about what it means to "really" go to an amusement park. Standing in line for 2 hours to ride a 45 second ride that disappoints or even worst makes you return the overpriced lunch of processed fried food you had just eaten. They don't know the joys of having the sun bake down on you for those two hours, the sweat pouring down your face and just as you seem to get under one of those sparsely placed cooling fans the line miraculously moves just far enough that the breeze that felt so inviting for 10 seconds is now gone. Yes, they have no idea what this means.

And, why you may ask? Is it that we do not go to amusement parks? No, we go frequently; in fact the catalyst to today's post is a trip we are taking today to Canobie Lake Park in Salem, NH. My family loves them!!! Is it because we have money like RIP Michael Jackson and we are able to close them for our own usage when we want? No, far from it. It's because of Nathaniel!

One of the industries that has embraced children with autism and other disabilities and their families is the Amusement Park Industry. They seem to understand the burden that families face when they go to these parks and hope to have a day of fun. In the case of a child with Autism the sensory aspects of an Amusement Park can be OVERLOAD CITY almost feeling as if he/she is under attack -- being touched constantly in line, combined with the noises and the smells. It is a war zone out there!! But, the sensory impact from a 30 second thrill ride can be almost therapeutic and meeting the characters in costume from the most well know to the most obscure can be almost euphoric. Now this depends on the child, but for our Nathaniel Amusement parks are a safe haven that he loves to frequent (especially Disney World as I wrote about In an earlier post )

So what has the industry done? Every park we have gone to (with one exception -- Santa's Village -- and to there defense I didn't see how it could be possible)has some system to allow these children (and adult) to bypass the long cues. We have a note from Nathaniel's doctor(neurologist)-- Dr. Peter Raffali; an amazing man that has been with Nathaniel since diagnosis -- that states that he is under his care for Autism and explains that he would have problems with crowds and close places that could cause him to become exceptionally upset, agitated, etc... etc... When we enter the park we bring this note to Guest Relations and they then give us a pass, or a special arm band for Nathaniel and the party with him (his family in this most caes but last year he used it on the Lowell Middle School band trip to Six Flags New England without us) to bypass the cues. Many of the parks have this as a very formal program with a guide book to what their policies are per ride -- where you enter, etc.. By far Disney is the best at doing this but below I will list some of the parks we have gone to and, our experience and their policy (at least at the time we went).

Now do we abuse this, NO I don't feel so. We have over time stretched the amount of time that Nathaniel can wait. In the beginning we almost always used it and then we would use the main line if their was no line. He would complain about "his pass. His pass" and we would work through it and go through the line. We gradually built up to waiting 15 minutes and on our trip this summer we stretched him to 25 minutes on a few occasions. We want him to be able to wait but not at the expense of him and the family having any chance at a good time and as he gets bigger and older their is the fear that if he gets very upset and hurts someone we then have to deal with that (not fair to him, us, or the people around him).

I want to make two final notes. The GIANTS like Disney and Universal have gone as far as to duplicate some of the "pre-attraction" stuff as you enter through the alternate entrance in some of the newer rides and Universal has even created areas where you can sit in air conditioning while you wait the Short time you have too. They are at the fore-front but they also have the most money I'm sure. Also I want to thank Community Connections for the tickets to Canobie Lake Park today

My other 3 children are in for a reality check when they go to a park without their brother but Rebecca has already said, "Uncle Nathaniel will always be welcome when I go with my kids." I guess we need to do a little more teaching.

Walt Disney World Flord and Disnelyand California

Go to guest relations and explain that you have a child with Autism. (always have the letter in case they ask and that is true for all parks.) They ask how many in your party and when you will be your last day visiting all parks. They then give you an Alternate Access Card that lists the child's name, number in party and dates it is valid for. With this card you can enter any fast pass lane (maybe wrong word). For rides without fast pass lanes you usually enter an alternate entrance, normally through the exit. We even once used it and bypassed the line for Mickey in toontown. WOW!!!

Universal Orlando --

There's is similar to Disney except instead of a pass you get a "ticket" for each member of your party and they reissue them each day just bring the tickets from the day before and exchange them. The only difference is you need to be a bit more "insistent" if your party is bigger than 3. They say they can only accommodate 2 other people, but they accommodated our whole party (6) this past July when we went.

Hershey Park http://www.hersheypark.com/ --

As with the above you go to guest relations and they give you a pass. The difference here is that they also give you a brochure that says how many people the pass can accommodate per ride. It varies for each ride so on this trip Nathaniel got to ride some rides multiple times if it did not accommodate all six of us.

Six Flags New England http://www.sixflags.com/newEnglan --

Once again you go to guest relations and they give you a pass. The only thing about this pass is you need to leave them a driver's license, credit card or something and you get it back when you return the pass.

Canobie Lake Park --

At Canobie they give you an arm band and for most rides you enter through the exits.

"Mommy did you ever do that?"

2009-08-12T17:48:00.004-04:00

"Why would they do that?" asked Nathaniel as we get into the car.
"What?" I asked.
"That's strange, Why would they do that." "Mommy did you ever do that?" continued Nathaniel

Still unsure what he was asking. We asked him to explain better.
"A girl! Kiss a girl. Why would they do that?" He asks again.

My wife had driven the van earlier and the radio was tuned to a top 40 station. The song "I Kissed A Girl" was playing as we got in.

"Mommy did you ever do that?" Nathaniel continues. "When you were a teenager?"

We talked with him and agreed with him that that was strange and my wife said not something she had done or would want to do?

This was the beginning of our night out with Nathaniel. He was the only one that had not seen the new Harry Potter film so we took him alone for a little 1:2 time. Hey why not he had free movie passes from DMR and he won't be getting any next year with the budget cuts.

He has come so far. He picked out the lyrics -- even the part of her being a teenager; processed to his own experiences and came to the conclusion (on his own) that the lyrics were odd and then further generalized to ask my wife (a girl) if she had ever experienced this "Strange" experience. WOW!!!! I am so happy even if it was an awkward moment.

Eunice Kennedy Shriver 1921-2009 RIP

2009-08-11T11:52:00.001-04:00

Bibity Bobity Boo!!

2009-08-11T11:18:00.002-04:00

"Bibity Bobity Boo," how I would love on many a day to utter those words and be transformed to a magical place. If only life where that easy, a simple "Bibity Bobity Boo" and all our troubles fears and anxieties could magically disappear if only for a moment (I'll be sure to get back before midnight). In that world life would be more manageable, but that world does not exist at least not were I am.

Nathaniel has that place, that magical place were everything that hinders him and makes him feel uneasy seems to go away. Disney World -- Nathaniel's dream world. I love bringing him because the minute he sees the first sign of Disney -- maybe it's at the airport or a billboard when we've driven now -- he begins to glow. He radiates in a way that makes me happy - you can't but be happy in the presence of this everglow.

As a result we try to get Nathaniel there whenever we can, every few years has been our success but I would love for it to be more. Going there energizes him. It brings forth a flood of language like nowhere else and it creates wonderful stories which he tells and retells and retells to anyone who will listen. Walt Disney World makes Nathaniel a social butterfly.

There it's ok to be "young." It's ok to still want to hug Mickey and get Donald's autograph. You see teens, young adults and grandparents all around you acting like children and I believe Nathaniel feels safe in that environment.

Nathaniel has a dream. He wants to "work" at Walt Disney World. I don't know if that dream is attainable, I pray that it will be and Theresa and I are committed to do whatever it will take to assist him in attaining it. We will even move to Florida with him. If you had asked me (or my wife for that matter) what is one place you would never want to live -- Florida would have been close if not at the top of my list. But, for Nathaniel, we would live there and do it with smile on our face if it meant he could live his dream and ever glow!!!

And then there were two!!!

2009-08-10T08:14:00.004-04:00

Anthony before he erupts his sister Rebecca behind him

Today our youngest turns 9. WOW!!!! He is beginning his last year as a single digit kid, it doesn't seem possible that we now have 4 children and they are all so big. I must admit I miss the days when they needed us and knew they needed us; all to often now they need us and don't realize it (and I know it will only get worst).

Anthony has been our greatest challenge. When he was born we already knew that Nathaniel had Autism and as a result where constantly looking at him with suspect eyes. Their is some evidence that a sibling is more prone to also be "on the spectrum" and the male to female ration for Autism is 4.3:1. We did all "the right" things early on and got him involved in appropriate learning environments, play groups, etc... We had him tested and everything was always ok.

But, Anthony had something wrong! From a very early age he was prone to extreme fits of rage that seemed to control him. By 5 years of age he was able to verbalize how he could not control himself; and talked in sometimes weird and grandiose ways. Once he got into school full-time he held it together but it just got worst at home. At age 7 he told us "you have a choice. I can hold it together at school or at home -- but I can not do both."

Anthony is finally receiving counseling and is on some medications to help with these issues. He is, as neuro-psych testing has shown, very bright but he has SEVERE Dysgraphia. He also has a severe case of ADHD with a mood disorder (it has not yet been conclusively diagnosed but probably some level of Bi-polar.)

Anthony, our youngest and Nathaniel, our oldest two children of God with their own distinct set of needs. We pray and do our best each day and hopefully we are open enough to hear what God needs us to do.

Who's the fool????

2009-08-09T21:08:00.003-04:00

Today was a typical Sunday. Liturgy followed by breakfast out and then normally a family activity, but my eyes today were opened a bit WIDER. I'm not sure why today had such an impression on me, maybe it was the fact that I began this blog and it has redirected my focus. I'm not sure but my impressions are here for your enjoyment anyways.

I still have grandiose ideas some days of what will eventually come of Nathaniel. I think I need to have these to keep me going; to help me to keep him going, so we never just settle for -- this is it! But then some days I see him in different settings and I get discouraged; today I thought was going to be one of those days but something happened......

At liturgy I was sitting next to Nathaniel, like I usually do and he was constantly drawing with his finger. I kept telling him to put his hand down (trying to be soft) and then I would move his hand down. He would then draw again and again. Finally he said, quite loud, "STOP! I'm making a cross!" I should have just let him do what he was doing. But in my desire for him not to stand out I forced him to stand out even more -- causing him to yell. And what was he doing? -- probably praying, he was focusing on the CROSS, meditating on the cross maybe in a way that more of us should and where was he doing this? At the liturgy at the remembrance of the Life Death and Resurrection of Our Lord Jesus Christ. One eye open wider!!!!!

Then this afternoon the whole family went to a Lowell Spinners, baseball game. They are a local Minor League team -- an affiliate of the Boston Red Sox. These games are always fun and Nathaniel enjoys going. In fact, we got the tickets for the whole family through Community Connections, a group in the Merrimack Valley that uses DMR grant money to provide families with entertainment opportunities.

At the game I began to have a lot of pain from sitting. ( I suffer from several painful conditions and sitting can be excruciating at times. ) I went up to the concourse and stood just behind where my family was sitting. From this vantage point I watched the game and more engrossing I watched Nathaniel. He, now 14, has come such a long way. He can sit for a 9 inning baseball game. He does the wave. He cheers and chants. He boos appropriately and laughs at the on field entertainment between innings. He eats all the appropriate baseball grub and doesn't look out of place doing it. When bored he taunts his sisters and brother a bit (as most siblings would). Wow, he has come a long way. Yes he looks a bit out of place, his movements seem a bit awkward and he looks younger than most 14 years old even though he is a giant. He looks so innocent and pure.

I stood there today and thought back to him drawing the cross over and over in the air. I saw this innocent young man before me and I thought to myself. He doesn't have to do anything grandiose. He already has. He shows me how pure and simple it is to be a Child of God and I begin to think; and how many more will he have the same effect on? I love this young man -- my son Nathaniel.

Will We Save our Children?

2009-08-08T22:14:00.003-04:00

At the Opening of the Knights Of Columbus Annual Meeting held in Phoenix, Az, this past week, Supreme Knight Carl Anderson had the following to say:

...reflecting on a meeting that the K of C Board of Directors had with Pope Benedict. The Holy Father urged them to “defend the moral truths necessary for a free and humane society, including the fundamental right to life of every human being.”

“This is why we stand for the right to life. This is why we stand for ethical business practices. This is why we stand for helping the intellectually disabled. This is why we stand for helping our neighbor in need,”

Respecting all human life from the point of conception till a natural death has got to be our goal as human beings. When we begin to pick and choose who should live and who should die we run the risk of killing our brother, our sister, our child. Some political commentators recently have come under fire for comparing this to a "nazi" social agenda. The term "Nazi" has such a negative conitation that I feel it should not be attached to anything else, but I understand why they are tempting to use it. We run the risk of deciding what human beings are viable, productive members of society and in doing so miss seeing the wealth of diversity that we will lose if we eliminated these members.

Their is a movement in this country and throughout the world for Assisted Suicide and selective Euthanasia.

In Britain the Royal College of Obstetrics and Gynecology proposed the following last year:

“We would like the working party to think more radically about non-resuscitation, withdrawal of treatment decisions, the best interests test and active euthanasia as they are ways of widening the management options available to the sickest of newborns.”

A provision in the current US House Bill for Health reform does the following. The legislation would provide Medicare coverage for an end-of-life consultation once every five years, and more frequent sessions if a person is suffering a life-threatening disease.

We, as a society, have been desensitized to human life through the ready access to abortion and artificial contraception. We are now being challenged when it comes to end of life issues.

Here, in the US, the discussion is most about end of life for the elderly but all we need to do is look across the pond (they are further ahead of us in the discussion -- already having people going to assisted suicide clinics in Sweden) and they are looking at it as another "option" for children born with severe disabilities.

God's love does not differentiate between the newly conceived infant still in his or her mother's womb and the child or young person, or the adult and the elderly person. God does not distinguish between them because he sees an impression of his own image and likeness (Gn 1:26) in each one. --Pope Benedict XVI

Pope Benedict XVI Making Disabled Youth a Priority

2009-08-07T22:50:00.002-04:00

Pope Bendict XVI blessing the Youth with Dissabilities in NYC

When Pope Bendict came to the United States in 2008 he made a point to meet with young people with disabilities in New York City. This visit was brief and informal as he shook hands and greeted these children and their parents.

During his trip to the Holy Land his first stop was to Regina Pacis, a home in Amman, Jordan, for mentally- and physically disabled youth.

While meeting with the youth at Regina Pacis Benedict XVI offered a reflection on the mystery of suffering as he spoke with the disabled youngsters and their caregivers.

"At times it is difficult to find a reason for what appears only as an obstacle to be overcome or even as pain -- physical or emotional -- to be endured," he said. "Yet faith and understanding help us to see a horizon beyond our own selves in order to imagine life as God does. God's unconditional love, which gives life to every human individual, points to a meaning and purpose for all human life."

The Holy Father confided that being with the youth was a blessing for him personally: "I wish to say that standing in your midst I draw strength from God."

"Your experience of trials, your witness to compassion, and your determination to overcome the obstacles you encounter, encourage me in the belief that suffering can bring about change for the good," he said. "In our own trials, and standing alongside others in their struggles, we glimpse the essence of our humanity, we become, as it were, more human.

Through the Glasses I've Been Given

2009-08-07T18:03:00.002-04:00

Parenthood is a time of joy, or so they say. There is no greater happiness than that of a parent, to watch your son or daughter grow up and achieve each milestone. You know, pre-k, 1st Communion, graduating elementary school, junior-high, their first date, driver's license, graduating high school, college and on and on until one day it's marriage. Then those little ones, grown-up, have children of their own and the cycle begins again with you as grandparents. But, what happens when those milestones are far less grandiose? Finally not wearing diapers (at age 7), being able to say a sentence, being able to say "I love you," not piling away when you offer them a kiss or a hug? Welcome to the world of Autism.

My oldest son, Nathaniel and I have had since birth a special bond. Tears swelled up in my eyes as he was placed in my hands for the first time. The amazement of this helpless life being entrusted to me and my wife overwhelmed me. He was so tiny in the gigantic paws of a man who stood over 6 feet tall and weighed almost 300 pounds (How could I ever do him justice?) My wife and I were amazed and so eager to enjoy him ever day and as most parents we dreamed the dreams of amazing things to happen to our Nathaniel.

He and I had our special place during that first year -- he was colicky at night so we would leave my wife to sleep and go to our special place. Together we would spend time in the Eucharistic chapel at our parish and sit in prayer. Immediately he would silence in the presence of our Lord. And then, when he fell asleep we would return to our apartment (my wife still asleep). He would then remain calm until it was time for our time together again, the next night. I knew Nathaniel was special from those nights together spent with our Lord; I just didn't know why.

As the years passed Nathaniel seemed to develop ok, a bit slow with some milestones but he had a keen ability to focus for long periods of time on a particular object or task, the one area of concern was language. He did not speak! (for a short time he developed six words and then lost them.) we were concerned but were told by our doctors not to worry. I being a special needs teacher and my wife being a nurse found this difficult to accept, but nobody is looking for something to be wrong with their child and the reassurance of our doctors over and over gave us something to believe in.

After our second child, Rebecca, (a year younger than Nathaniel) rocketed past Nathaniel in language acquisition we INSISTED that Nathaniel be tested. The doctor's were still hesitant but caved to our determination. The testing was clear -- Nathaniel had Autism. I being a special needs teacher felt I should have known more. I felt lost! What did that mean -- Autism? What could he do? What could he not do? What would come of our Nathaniel? Our Dreams for him? Now the adventure would begin. Or better said, the unplotted course could begin to be plotted on a map larger than I ever could have imagined. For with Autism it is not a simple course from point A to point B because point B is not known.

You see, having a child with Autism is so different. You don't know what to expect. You don't know the cause or even the treatment. You don't know what the ultimate ability will be. So how do you prepare? You need to prepare for everything. You need to be ready for the possibility that he may need you forever or he could go on to have a PHD and a family. How do you do that and at the same time try to provide for the intense services and needs that he has this day, all the time trying not to worry to much about tomorrow? It is very difficult and often times feels impossible. But IT IS having a child with Autism. You begin by recognizing the milestones that many other parents just take for granted.

Nathaniel being defiant for the first time was a positive milestone because it showed that he could show personal wants and not just do what he was told. This particular milestone was difficult to grasp. You need to both praise and correct at the same time,ca difficult task for young parents dealing with a disease so few understand.

Nathaniel making it to the bathroom but not going potty in the bathroom was a positive milestone because many children with Autism need to learn each task in a micro not a macro way. A very difficult concept for me who sees everything WHOLE picture.

When you have a child with Autism you throw out the child rearing books and the self-help gurus and you learn how to raise YOUR child. When he is one of four children you try to explain to the other three, to the best of your ability, why some things are different for Nathaniel and still life never seems fair in their eyes.

Parenthood is a time of joy and happiness as i said in the beginning. It is a time of great fulfillment but only because I was able to look at it through the glasses I was given and not the ones I wanted to buy. I can't trade my glasses for somebody else's. I can't get a new model or a designer pair. All I can do is continue to clean the ones I have and pray they will always be able to focus my eyes.